Session 15 - Ghosts of Alderaan
Our scruffy nerfherders undertake a dangerous mission to turn an Imperial Agent from Alderaan. But can they even get on his ship safely or will they die in the vacuum of space?
Scruffy Nerfherders Full Episode
Originally aired: December 7, 2017
Podcast Edited by Addy Thomas
Music: Purple Planet Music
Music: www.purple-planet.com
Certain Point Of View is a podcast network brining you all sorts of nerdy goodness! From Star Wars role playing, to Disney day dreaming, to video game love, we've got the show for you! Learn more on our website: https://www.certainpov.com
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⏱️ YouTube Chapters
00:09 – Intro & Cast Roll Call
02:00 – Recap: Trauma, Gambling & The Hutt Deal
🚀 Mission Setup
04:47 – Hyperspace Exit & Alderaan Briefing
06:00 – The Plan: Hide in the Asteroid Field
💥 Asteroid Run (aka “Everything Goes Wrong”)
10:24 – Enter the Asteroid Field
12:50 – Impact & System Failures
14:40 – Regaining Control & Safe Landing
🕵️ The Infiltration Plan
18:33 – Mission Brief: Turn the Imperial Officer
22:51 – Target Acquired: Corvette Arrival
🌌 Spacewalk Disaster
23:54 – Launch Into Space (Body Bags??)
25:07 – Huuf Goes Rogue (Asteroid to the Groin)
28:57 – Force Rescue & Ship Approach
🚪 Boarding the Ship
30:32 – Airlock Entry Attempts
37:33 – Breaking Into the Ship
🧠 Inside the Corvette
43:53 – Stealth vs Diplomacy Debate
45:12 – Ship Layout & Strategy
52:11 – Sneaking to Living Quarters
🎭 The Plan (That Will Definitely Go Wrong)
55:01 – Disguise & Solo Infiltration Plan
🔚 Cliffhanger
57:02 – “Never Tell Me the Odds” – Session End
Transcription
00:09
Welcome to the Scruffy Nerf Herders. I'm Adi Thomas, and I play the Force Adept.
00:14
I am Ben Milton. I play Phallus Vaz Killer, the Human Fringer.
00:18
What's up, guys? I am Huflung Dung and Misa Gungun Soldier. Hey, guys.
00:24
I am J. Mike, and I play.
00:25
Stembolt's Noor, the Zabrak Tech specialist. And I am Case. I am the DM for this. And by the way, Hu flung Dong is Corey. Yeah, forget your name.
00:37
That's what I said.
00:38
That's what I said. Cory in the house.
00:41
AKA.
00:43
Have you gotten that right yet?
00:45
I don't know.
00:46
Early one.
00:48
Yeah, I wouldn't start with early. It was like somewhere in the mid. You would think somewhere in the nadir of the arc. Practice makes perfect. Gotta keep on swimming.
01:00
Well, don't forget, you can check out our other podcasts, all@ certainpov.com, not only scruffy Nerfherders, but we've also split out into additional feeds, one dedicated to each of our podcasts. Case has got his podcast, Another Pass. And we've. Ben and I have also got certain point of view. Sometimes J. Mike decides to show up, sometimes he doesn't. Usually he's not even there mentally, even when he is there physically.
01:22
But, you know, not that you could tell the difference.
01:23
Right. Well, we still have a lot of fun on all three podcasts, but you can choose which podcasts you want to be a part of, separate feeds. So please rate, subscribe, and review the ones that you like. Or review all three. That's what we'd prefer. All of that again is@ certainpov.com. Case.
01:40
Yeah, five stars would be appreciated by everyone listening to this, which is kind of the problem right there. We need a few more people, right? Yeah. So tell your friends. Yeah, everyone.
01:50
Spread the word. Like a venereal disease.
01:52
Come on, do it. Huh?
01:54
Do it. Could I have everyone give me a D20 roll, please, for recap?
02:00
13. Oh, yeah.
02:01
This night is gonna be great.
02:04
9, 3, 1. I feel you're lying. You are such a liar.
02:11
I got a one. I gotta tell the story, and whoever got the highest gets the.
02:14
Oh, right.
02:14
Okay. So, yeah, believe me, I would not.
02:18
I got 13.
02:19
Okay. Yeah, 13. Great.
02:20
Yeah, 13's high roll.
02:22
He got three, I got a three, and he got a dime. Oh, man. Yeah. Sucks to be me.
02:27
I should have said two.
02:31
Nice.
02:33
All right, so here's what happened. Here's what I remember. Addie got raped.
02:38
Yeah.
02:39
Fojo got raped.
02:41
Whatever.
02:42
There's a difference, guys.
02:46
Hashtag me too.
02:50
What?
02:53
So we ended up taking a detour with Slippery Gem took us to this giant. It's not a colony, but it's a giant ship where like, it was like, way bigger than Fossils Atoll, right. And so they were going to get information and some stuff before went to Coruscant from this hut that he knew. So Addie and Slippery Jim, his mother's, went off to do that while J Mike and Corey and I ended up playing and betting some. Some gambling stuff. Corey was. Was doing some gun slinging. And along the process, I made a ton of money. And J. Mike lost all of his. Everything. Most of it. Right. And then in the. And unfortunate. Unfortunately for Addie and Slippery Jim, the deal went really dark and successful.
03:51
And Reggie. Reggie was there too. Reggie has even more terrible memories to work through.
03:57
Yes.
03:59
PTSD is going to last a little.
04:01
Bit longer for Reggie. And it now has officially been given to Addie as well. Some dark things happened that he won't talk about anymore. So now we're leaving that place and we're on our way to Coruscant. No, we're not Coruscant.
04:15
I mean the remnants of Alderaan.
04:17
Remnants of Alderaan. That's where it was. Alderaan.
04:20
There's a subtle difference between those two.
04:22
One is flying chunks.
04:23
Yes, yes. And the other one's an asteroid field.
04:28
So that's where we are.
04:30
That.
04:30
At least that's how I remember.
04:31
Yes. Yes. That's an accurate description of it.
04:34
There you go, Addie. Enjoy that xp. Thank you.
04:37
Yeah, thank you for doing that.
04:38
Take it like you took that hut.
04:41
No, I'll enjoy this.
04:42
There.
04:45
All right.
04:47
Nice. We open with a human wrapped in thick layers of leather and crude metal, hurrying down a dark hallway. He comes to the end of the room and kneels and raises a blade in his hands, presenting it from the shadow. A hand extends. The sword flies out of the human's hand and into the outstretched hand. It's real. Fo sho. You see that? There's a startle. The ship is coming out of lightspeed. Fosho. You're awakened. Having been asleep for part of the journey, Slippery Jim comes on over the comms. You said Guys, wesa getting close, so come on up to the briefing room. We need to go over some stuff.
05:45
I've always wanted to say this. Aye, aye, Captain.
05:48
Nice dream come true.
05:50
God.
05:50
Congratulations.
05:51
All right, you guys all gather. You all gather in the meeting room, so that can go over plans.
06:00
Cool.
06:01
Everybody here. But nobody else saw that. You guys feeling rest? I feel great.
06:05
I did not get great. Surprisingly.
06:07
I feel great too.
06:08
What's wrong, buddy?
06:09
I'm just working through some. Well, you know what? Let's just move on. What are we working on?
06:14
Yeah, I would agree we. We don't need to think about our nightmares.
06:18
You know, you guys have not been the same since. You know, we had our little.
06:22
Have any of us been. Cuz you guys haven't been the same. Including Stimbolt's bank account.
06:26
If you guys ever need to talk, just know that I got your back too soon.
06:30
You seem angry about something.
06:32
Who seems a little stunned too.
06:34
Thanks for redirecting the attention off of us. Yes, you said guys a couple of characters. Okay, so hey, we're coming out of hyperspace right now. We're almost to Alderaan. Or what's left of it. So here's the deal. Cosmopolitan Swift is not exactly going to do so hot in a field this dense. So Findir, Reggie and Zeff will stay here and we will stay out of the field and theoretically outside of the Imperial Centaur arrays. Meanwhile, Misa going to pilot our cargo. With the Susan tucked away inside. We're gonna go into the asteroid field and hide away say because there might be some Imperials coming here and well as we all know whisa have a mission to attend to. What's the use of. Guys, think of that.
07:49
Let's make it happen, Captain.
07:52
Yes, let's do it.
07:56
Okie. Ok, now let's all get on board and just be. Just be so ready because Pigo and Garth will be scanning and we gonna have to move quick when Issa come around. Okay, so you guys all pile into the sort of. I'd describe it as being like a space camper giant Winnebago basically.
08:25
Is that an rv? This is the best.
08:27
Smaller than the Cosmopolitan Swift, bigger than the Susan. It is actually sort of a. Mobile command center that you guys are going to steer into the asteroid field and implant it into an asteroid so that when the Imperials come near, you're hidden essentially. Okay, cool. Sounds dangerous. Let's do it. So guys, I'm going to need some help. I'm going to need some people checking out all the sensors. I'm going to need some people making sure all the systems are good. I'm going to need some people to. Well to help me pilot this thing because I saw a superb pilot. But pilot's only as good as this crew, right? All right, well Roger. I know a Great pilot, but he's afraid of hyperspeed. No, Fendir's watching the other ship. I need someone I can trust.
09:26
Got it.
09:27
You. I need someone on guns. Also, because we're gonna have small ones coming in, we need to be protected.
09:34
I think Hoof would be great on guns. He's got that reflexes.
09:37
Hoof, get your defense stations. All right, and with my defense, can.
09:41
I get fire extinguishers?
09:43
My Gunion. We have plenty of fire extinguishers because we might be blowing up.
09:46
Boom.
09:47
Gonna need those.
09:48
Okay, there's fire extinguishers all over. Make sure you note that.
09:53
All right, what other stations do we need to.
09:56
I'm gonna. I'm gonna need communications. I'm gonna need sensors, and probably someone to be repairing stuff.
10:02
What's your computer?
10:03
I got great repair.
10:04
I'll do repair.
10:05
I got a 10 repair.
10:06
You do repair?
10:08
Remember?
10:08
I spent an entire sensor and I.
10:11
Guess I got communication. That's very true. Sure did.
10:14
I spend an entire episode, right?
10:17
You're a hard worker. You were, like, pale and sweaty with all that work too. Oh, yeah. Super.
10:24
Jim hops into the pilot seat and pushes forward on the thrusters. And it takes off. You exit the loading dock of the Cosmopolitan Swift and start rushing into the field immediately. Asteroids start coming at you. We got a couple coming. Hoof, get your shots off. All right, give me a couple of attack rolls. Meanwhile, can we get sensors working to determine where everything is and what's the best place to go?
10:56
All right.
10:56
All right, 23 on sensors.
10:58
I'm gonna be busy. I can tell.
10:59
Yeah.
11:01
Well, sir, my Stimbot. You, sir doing pretty well. We. I can see a good asteroid for us to park in. It's not too far. Hopefully we can make it there with no surprise.
11:11
I did a thing.
11:12
Hey, those asteroids are coming close. Hoover, how are we doing on guns?
11:15
Good.
11:16
Locked and loaded.
11:17
22.
11:18
Dude, you blew your eyes from the sky, buddy.
11:21
Do you feel lucky? Well, do you, punk?
11:26
All right, we need to do censor sweeps, my buddy. Drink.
11:30
Star wars reference. No, wrong movie. That was not a Star wars reference, man. That was Dirty Harry.
11:41
Oh, my buddy, I need confirmation that there's no Imperial transponder signals here yet.
11:46
Roll your dice, fool.
11:50
16. Boom. All right, it looks like we are clear. We are moving in. More asteroids. More asteroids. Who? 15. You take the shots out. That's great, man.
12:04
Oh, yeah.
12:06
Stimboat, don't get cocky. You said we need to know before they get that boost. How many are coming?
12:11
2626 With it.
12:13
26. You can tell me that there is three more coming. I need three shots. One.
12:20
No, don't let it be a one.
12:24
15. 19, And 23.
12:30
Pew, pew.
12:31
You take out two spectacularly. The first one is a little big and doesn't fully get destroyed by that shot.
12:40
Shoot again.
12:40
Brace for impact, guys.
12:41
Brace for impact. Hold on to your butts.
12:50
You guys all feel the smack as a large chunk of an asteroid slams into the ship. Let's get some repair checks to make sure that everything's kept together. 15. All right, you're able to stop the spraying out smoke that's coming out of some of the panels, but it's not completely fixed. You're not out of the woods right now.
13:11
All right, guys, let's not do that again.
13:13
Until you are able to get everything underway, all the other checks are going to be at disadvantage, okay? Which is roll twice and take the worst, okay? All right, don't do that again.
13:26
We.
13:27
That's all our rules. Not just.
13:29
Oh, not his. Because he's the one repairing stuff. You guys are using the systems that he's needing to repair. I'll get it fixed.
13:35
Just give me a second.
13:36
Well, you better hurry it up down there. You have a reactor leak down there.
13:41
I need to know what's coming. I feel like I'm flying blind.
13:45
I feel like I just got raped by a hut.
13:52
Really, I need extra disadvantage.
13:54
You're doing a really good job, my friends. That. That's what it tells me. We got one coming up above us, buddy. Take a shot.
14:04
Eighteen. Pew.
14:05
That's a. That's good. How are my repairs coming, 21? All right, all right. The system's no longer flitzing. Good job, my friend.
14:14
That's what I do. That's what I do. Yeah, boy.
14:18
See that? Android asteroid, are you reading any imperial signals Exploded like my.
14:27
I can't see. It's a three. I can't see. Oh, I got a pimple.
14:34
You, sir, you're supposed to be using all your assets. What about your weird mind thingies? Give me one of those rolls.
14:40
Use the force.
14:42
The farce.
14:43
The farce. Sixteen.
14:46
Boom. All right, use. Not getting anything on your signals, but you're at least able to sort of sense where your mind exists out there and know that there's nothing. So thank you, my friend.
15:00
Good job.
15:03
Sinisters, what's in front of us? You, sir, are very good at pointing out all of the oncoming asteroid field. Can I get four attack rose, my buddy. 26, You said doing great. 22 You saw on fire.
15:24
What were these rolls last time?
15:26
Man, you know, life's on the line. Oh, you suck. Completely cleared the debris field. Oh, Megan.
15:33
Woohoo.
15:34
All the ones that were big enough that our deflector shields would not handle it. I've been eliminated. And we're coming up on the asteroid. Everyone brace. We're about to impact. And then drill into the surface.
15:44
You're familiar with this?
15:45
Addie, I need sensors to tell me if I'm on target.
15:51
This is where you gotta roll.
15:53
You can do it, 25. Yes.
15:56
All right.
15:57
Thank you, my friend. You are a handy addition to our complement of crew. Thank you, Captain. We're getting into position. We're coming in at the right angle.
16:06
Gonna get him a red shirt for Christmas.
16:14
The vessel slams into the side of a large asteroid, but its landing gear is. Is prepped. So you guys get. Feel the shudder of it. Hold on to your butts.
16:26
Drink. Star wars reference.
16:30
Drink your waters.
16:34
I'm thirsty. Anyway,.
16:41
The landing gear braces it and. And then laser torches come out of it, beginning to cut into the side of the asteroid. It breaks up enough of a crevice that the vessel is able to insert itself in, and then using tractor beams, pull in some of the debris to block off the hull to make it invisible inside the. Inside the asteroid.
17:07
Oh, that's clever. Cool.
17:11
All right. All right.
17:12
So now we still gotta wait fo. You are doing so good on your communications watch. Can I have you monitoring for signals and stimboats? You should be checking to see if there's any vessels, any unnatural movements moving through.
17:33
I've got an 18 wood snap.
17:37
All right, good sweep. Good sweep. So far, nothing that is appreciated though. We'll come back to you guys in a second because I should probably go over some of the things Whisa are gonna have to do. So actually foe. Why don't you come. Why don't you, sir come over here. Pigo, you and Garth, you sir, should take over for. For the moment. So when. When this guy comes, he's a lieutenant commander in the Imperial army. He's actually Imperial intelligence, but he is a former senator, junior senator of Alderaan. His name is Falto Dragon. If he is coming back this way, which we have reason to believe, we sir, could talk to him.
18:33
Are we planning to capture him?
18:35
We, sir, planning to turn him. So here's what rebel high command has ordered us to do. Wisa need to get on board his ship, talk to his people, sneak past his guards, show him the Video that were going to broadcast over the HoloNet. So that he can see that the Empire destroyed his homeworld. And when we convince him of that, we will have a very powerful ally inside the Imperial Forces. He's making a pilgrimage. He should be here soon. He's got the highest. So when his ship gets here, we are going to need to figure out the make and model of that ship. And then we are going to need to board it without them knowing that we're getting close.
19:33
And I don't know about you, but it is pretty obvious when we got a bunch of people in spacesuits making a leap off an asteroid onto a spaceship. So here's the deal. We got these things, they're called body backs. They are a stealth wrap that you put around. It's gonna be kind of constricting, but all our sensors bounce right off. Won't pick you up at all. You'll be in spacesuits. And then once you get close enough in, it has magnets that'll lock you onto the side of a built of a ship. You're gonna have to climb your way to an airlock and get in. Now of course, unfortunately for us, we only have one gun. Gungan shaped spacesuit. And a pretty essential back here on the vessel. So my friend, you guys know any Gungans around here? My gungun.
20:22
My gun.
20:24
My gun. Gun. Yousa gonna be a great aid to the rebellion right now.
20:30
Musa. Ready?
20:32
Yes, sir. Yuza.
20:37
Where I'm gonna die. I really hope he doesn't miss the ship entirely.
20:43
Over.
20:48
Yes. Wisa cannot be doing anything with like the grappling hooks or anything like that. That is a bit too obvious. Their sensors will pick you up pretty fast. So when you guys get in these bags, it's gonna be kind of tight. It's gonna be some restrictive checks to get to maneuver yourselves close to it. Unfortunately, any heat signature, any propulsion, any gas release, it's gonna be bad.
21:14
Gas release? Their failures. Yeah. Squeeze a little tighter. Make sure Moses can't even part that. All right. But Space Moses. Space Moses.
21:25
If you get to the airlock, I'm pretty sure that either my Zabrak friends or actually my short tongue buddy. What up? Have been showing themselves to be pretty good with a computer and able to bypass the airlock, get in stealthily, get up to the bridge and into the captain's quarters and speak with Lieutenant Commander.
21:47
What kind of resistance are we looking at on this ship?
21:50
Probably just a bunch of guys with the big white hats. You know, it's The Alderaan Guards.
21:54
It's a diplomatic ship.
21:56
You might have a couple stormtroopers. He is part of the Imperium, but he sahir as a pilgrimage to his dead home. I tend to suspect that he doesn't have too heavy a compliment.
22:11
Okay, we should expect stormtroopers.
22:15
Lots of stormtroopers. I feel disturbance in the force. Right movie this time.
22:22
Impressive.
22:23
Boom.
22:24
All right, cool. Well, where you got these bags at?
22:29
Over here by the airlock. It's going to be gonna have to get ready for it. Hey, Piggo. What did he call me?
22:37
No, no. He's not talking to you.
22:40
Thanks, Pigo. Picking up anything up there? Oh, no way. Well, I guess the Empire is here.
22:51
All right. Let's do this boys. Last one into their body bags of rotten egg.
22:58
I want to play. I want to play. Slippery Jim pulls up a view screen and you're able to see what's outside. Coming into the edge of the asteroid field is a CR90 Corvette. Popular amongst officials from Alderaan. Alright guys, so you want to put on your spacesuits and then. And then zip up, have some fun.
23:27
There are no buttons in Star Wars. That's canon. Pablo Hidalgo has confirmed that.
23:37
Oh, it's okay, guys. Oh, it's okay. You see get zipped up and just kind of waddle over to the edge of the airlock there. Can I have everyone make dexterity checks to just waddle to the edge?
23:54
11, 12, 16. My gungan.
23:58
All right, you guys all successfully kind of waddle in these tight bags up against the airlock. Slippery Jim gets behind the other side of it. It's like you said, guys. Doing the right thing. Used to servin Bang.
24:15
Is this a Spike Lee.
24:20
You said? No, you can't use spikes. That's gonna alert the signals. Darn. Have a. Well, hopefully at least one of you survives. This will be good. And he hits a button and the doors slam shut. And then the doors out into space open up and you're all propelled outwards. Oh shit.
24:40
I don't like this.
24:41
Could everyone give me dexterity checks to position themselves appropriately as the rush of air sends you out into space.
24:53
19, 13, 16. I'm McLovin.
24:58
Jigga jigga nine hu flung dung veers off wildy in the wrong direction.
25:07
No surprise.
25:14
So the bags you're in are actually translucent. You're able to see out of it and see him flying. It just sensor rays would be bounced off of it. Basically makes you radar invisible. And you see hoof flying off into the wrong direction.
25:34
Fine.
25:36
We're better off. And this was Corey's last episode. Bye, Moon man.
25:50
First give me a spot check.
25:53
Rocket man.
25:54
Dear God, give me a spot check. Drink.
25:57
Star wars reference. No, no.
26:00
But you do need to keep flung dung spot chug.
26:07
Negative. Wait, what?
26:09
What? Yeah, I rolled a one minus two. Well, so you don't. You don't see it coming. And all of a sudden a decent sized asteroid slams into your nuts. First, give me a fortitude save.
26:31
Roll the dice.
26:32
Which one?
26:33
Yep.
26:34
And then add your forward shoot save six.
26:39
Oh, God, guys. It's great playing with you, Corey.
26:42
Oh, it's a flashback.
26:43
Like my singing career.
26:44
All right.
26:48
And then they put an asteroid to the balls.
26:51
Despite the intense pain that's surging through your body, it's actually only one point of vitality damage.
26:57
I can't feel my legs.
27:00
But give me a reflex save to bounce off the asteroid. Back on course.
27:10
Remember your training. Can I also use move object to try to pull him?
27:14
Yes, you may use it in conjunction because if you do it well, I will give him advantage on this roll. Oh, snap.
27:22
And I throw an asteroid at Addy.
27:24
To keep him from. That's my boy. Blue.
27:29
Drake.
27:31
Natural 20. So 24.
27:34
All right, so describe what you do. Hoop or a foe?
27:40
I reach out with the force and I'm just. Because I'm a little frustrated with hoop, I'm gonna grab him by the neck. No, no, no. And just try to pull him like back towards us and to the. To the spaceship.
27:55
All right.
27:56
Poof.
27:57
So give me that roll with advantage. So roll twice, take the best of the two and then add four to that roll. All right, so.
28:08
Best plus four. 22.
28:12
All right. The scruff of your neck starts pulling you off of that asteroid as you instinctively upon impact to your balls thrust forward, also propelling you in that same direction. And you find yourself being carried back to the group. And you guys all slowly float towards the edge of this Corvette. Foe. Can you give me a move object check to sort of help guide you guys so that you're closer to the airlock than you necessarily would be?
28:57
You can do it.
29:01
17.
29:04
Okay, so you, between those two efforts, have taken five vitality points of damage just because the stress on it. However, you are able to guide your friends and yourself closer to the airlock so that as you come close to the hull of the ship and the magnetic connection of your bags pull you in, you will not have to climb as far to get to the door. Your bodies slam into the side of the Ship.
29:38
No.
29:38
Harder. I should remind you there's small asteroids everywhere. There are basketball sized ones. There's just debris everywhere. Most of this is not large enough or solid enough to do damage to any sort of vessel. It's only big ones that are really that huge of a concern. So the impacts that you guys make upon the side of the ship really aren't any harder than the weird frozen bits of grass and dirt. And occasionally you see human bodies slam against it. But your impact isn't any more profound, so the sensors don't notice you and your bags cling to the side of the ship. So if you are able to unzip yourselves, you'll be able to pull yourself along the ship to the nearby airlock.
30:32
Awesome sauce. Let's do this.
30:34
Could I have everyone give me. I guess this is a street. Well, we'll call it a reflex save to maneuver out of your bags. 17, 14, 11, 10.
30:54
I mean, it makes sense. That's not a huge surprise. We just got hitting the balls, guys.
30:59
Let's.
30:59
Come on, man. Alias and foe are easily able to unzip themselves. Meanwhile, Stimbolts.
31:06
My zipper's comfortable with that yet? Zip funk. My zipper stuck. Guys, my zipper stuck. We got a bleeder.
31:17
Oh, my God.
31:18
Drink, no.
31:21
Failures. And Foe, give me spot checks to look around as you're coming out of the bags.
31:25
22, 18.
31:28
All right. You both see places that you can grab onto as you pull yourselves out. Grab them and you see that your friends are. Don't leave us. Attached to the side of the ship but unable to get free.
31:40
These idiots.
31:43
I miss Finn deer sometimes.
31:45
They really do.
31:46
Can I have both of you give.
31:47
Me climb checks to get over to your friends to assist them. Assist us. 16 1.
31:56
Just stop this, all right? So am I the only one that.
31:59
Knows how to do anything?
32:00
Was barely able to hang onto the side of the ship without drifting off into space. So he's clutching on.
32:07
I just pulled him with a force onto the ship.
32:09
Thales is able to climb over to Hoof, who's a little bit closer to him and assist him while. So Hoof, give me another reflex save, but with the advantage because yes, Trailace is assisting you. Meanwhile, Foe, if you want to do anything with the force to assist Stimbolt, you are welcome to.
32:32
I don't know if I really want to.
32:33
You don't have to.
32:34
Force lightning. Force lightning. He'll motivate him.
32:38
Alert everyone.
32:43
And scene.
32:46
Turret pops out of the side of the ship and shoots for.
32:48
All four of you. Next Week on the screen. Scrappy Nerf hurts. We'd be our new crew. Poof.
32:57
What's the result of your reflex save? Oh, I am so glad I have good reflexes, guys. Nine.
33:03
That's what the modified bear.
33:05
Yeah. That was your.
33:06
Wait.
33:07
Plus four. So you rolled it?
33:08
Yeah.
33:09
Wait, so my best one was a five? Your worst one was a one.
33:12
Oh, Jesus Christ. I'm gonna use Force Inspire to see if that helps. J. Blast.
33:19
Yes, you may.
33:21
Oh, jeez. I don't feel so good, guys. My balls are in my stomach. So my Force Inspire was a 16.
33:34
J, give me a stimult. Well, Stimbolt, give me a reflex save with advantage. Meanwhile, we can establish that apparently Hung Dung's voice has actually dropped because.
33:46
Hey, guys, I got hit in the balls.
33:51
Meanwhile, Foe, you take another point of vitality damage.
33:54
Ugh.
33:54
17. All right, you're. You're able to pull yourself free.
33:59
Freedom. Don't leave me.
34:01
Do you feel.
34:02
Feel more confidently motivated for some reason?
34:04
J, give me a spot check. Oh, God.
34:06
And this is where you fly off space.
34:08
Spot me.
34:13
You are able to spot a. A a Grabbing on point. It's not as close to the airlock as. As where Foe and Failures were able to grab, but you're at least secure. Yay.
34:23
That's what happens when he listens to some Obi Wan Robins.
34:26
Felius, are you still assisting Hu Fengung? We're gonna need him. We're gonna need him.
34:35
Yes, I will.
34:36
All right, give me another reflex save with advantage.
34:39
Me.
34:40
Yep.
34:42
Zig Ziglar's already a Star wars name. What am I rolling with?
34:45
Advantage Reflex with advantage twice. One more.
34:49
All right, one ball dropped back down, but the other one's still in my stomach.
34:53
Hoof is able to get free of his bindings. Hoof, give me a spot check as well.
34:56
All right, this is where you fly off.
34:59
I'll say goodbye.
35:00
Come one. Come one.
35:03
This is so great. Bye, Moon Man.
35:05
Negative one.
35:06
Again.
35:09
Failures.
35:10
Give.
35:11
Give me a reflex save to see if you catch him before he drifts off into space.
35:16
Oh, gosh.
35:19
12.
35:19
Not like this. Yeah, like this.
35:22
Not like this.
35:22
Like this. Not like this.
35:25
You try to grab him, but fail. However, Stimball, give me a reflex.
35:32
What are you doing? I'm sorry.
35:36
Don't let go.
35:36
Jack, there's no room on this shoe. There's no room.
35:46
Both of your grasped poof, it's on you. You're going to need to force him close.
35:51
Is it foe?
35:51
Pardon me?
35:52
Foe. Foe.
35:56
It is on you. You're going to need to guide him.
35:58
There's no way.
35:59
20.
36:00
For the love of the foe. So 24.
36:02
You suck him back into you. So Hulu Von Dun is being propelled through space. Keep sucking towards Pro show. Could I have failures and Stimbolt. Give me climb checks to get back to the like to the gripping point that faux Shou was at so close to the airlock. 17, Take another point of vitality damage.
36:26
You're gonna die saving this idiot.
36:29
And some motivating him too. Let's not to get. I took damage for him to get motivated to take a zipper. Screw it, guys. I'm just gonna stay here. At least we know he's clumsy.
36:40
Steadwell tries to climb away, but is unable to get his bearings. I'm 17. 17, You're able to start climbing towards the airlock.
36:48
You're not the only one who knows.
36:50
What they're doing here. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I've been moving objects like a pro who fell off the ship. That's fair.
36:56
All right, Felius, as you're able to get so close to the airlock, you're able to access a panel if you want to start working on it to try to get in. Meanwhile, computer, use your repair one of the two. Meanwhile, Stembal, you need to climb over. You were having trouble before, so please give me a climb check.
37:18
16.
37:19
All right, you're able to pull yourself over. Sorry, what was that?
37:21
27.
37:22
27. You just. You like tap the panel. All of a sudden everything opens up.
37:27
Like just magic hands, chest hands.
37:33
Could I have everyone give me climb checks to get into the airlock?
37:37
Oh, 18.
37:38
14.
37:40
Come on, dude.
37:41
Please give me a 1 8.
37:44
That's pretty bad.
37:46
Okay, for those of you who got an 11 or higher, your 18 balls easily pull yourselves in. Meanwhile, those of you who are not are on the edge, but you're just. You're in the zero gravity environment. You're just not able to like swing yourselves around properly. So you're still having trouble with that. Meanwhile, so failures, you can start looking at the next door to see about closing the one outside, waiting for your friends to get in or opening the one to get inside. And maybe you guys want to figure out what's on the other side of the airlock. How would we figure that out?
38:26
Well, use your force powers as soon as anybody.
38:29
I was gonna say open it, but yeah,.
38:35
I mean, that is an option.
38:36
Well, we're on the outside, aren't we?
38:38
Yeah, you're on the inner chamber of the airlock. Now.
38:40
Right. So we're opening to get into.
38:43
The actual ship itself.
38:44
Yeah.
38:44
We're not going to get sucked out.
38:46
Well, we might. We could do that. We could get shot down.
38:50
Give me a straight intelligence check.
38:53
Everyone.
38:54
Come on. I hope it doesn't depend on my numbers. 6, 18. Oh, thank you, Addy. I got real stupid for a second. We all have our moments. Like sometimes when I'm climbing, I just.
39:09
Forget how to hold onto the ship.
39:11
Right. I've always been clumsy.
39:13
And Stimbolt.
39:14
Eight.
39:14
That's right. Okay, so to stimbolt and failures. This sounds like a great idea.
39:22
Sorry, you put the wrong button.
39:24
I shouldn't have stopped you because it's.
39:27
Are you sure? Yes.
39:28
Come on.
39:29
Is that plus 10?
39:31
Christmas man.
39:32
No.
39:33
Okay, so to four. To failures. STEM bomb and Wolf. The idea just opened the door.
39:40
I'm rolling an intelligence check.
39:43
Sounds like a great idea. To Phelius, Stembalt and Hoof, the idea of opening the door sounds like a great idea.
39:52
It is a great idea.
39:53
But foe is aware that if you open the door without closing the other one, you are going to make a very obvious vacuum effect inside of a ship, alerting a lot of people and potentially blowing you guys all out into space as the rush of atmosphere hits you all.
40:11
Frankly, some of us deserve to be blown out into space.
40:14
Do you convey this to them?
40:15
Yes. Guys, let's close the other door first.
40:18
So you still have two friends outside. They should make climb checks and see if they can get in.
40:22
Go. Get those idiots in. I'll start working on the climb. Check.
40:25
Climbing.
40:26
Ready?
40:27
Yep. Let's see who might need a little bit of a force nudge.
40:31
You don't also have to use the force. You could also just grapple.
40:35
Is that a dexterity check?
40:37
Double digits. 10. Yeah.
40:41
Handle animal.
40:42
Yeah, I'll say. Dexterity check. Sorry.
40:45
15. 15.
40:51
I like that.
40:51
That's creative.
40:52
I'm proud of you.
40:55
Stimbo pulled himself up some deep seated racist issues with how I view Zabrax. Wow.
41:05
That's a good boy. Come on, buddy.
41:10
Oh, wow.
41:11
Sir. I got a treat. Sir.
41:17
Dexterity is what collar on him.
41:23
11.
41:28
Sorry. And Hoof, what was your climb? Check to get in 10. You're helping him to pull in, but you're just not getting the right position on it. However, now stem ball is in position to assist as well. So you can use. You can do either dexterity or strength check. Whichever is better. They're the same. 18. All right. Yeah. You're able to. You make the difference and you pull them in. All right, so you guys are all inside the chamber now. Failures, you probably want to close that door.
42:05
28.
42:06
You close the door. And now do you guys want to open the next one? What's on the other side of this door?
42:12
I'm going to use far scene just to kind of sense what's on the other side of the door. Door.
42:16
All right, Magic man, Big money, no whammies.
42:23
14.
42:23
There we go. There's a hallway. There's no one immediately outside. You can also tell that there's a lot of living chambers and spaces, but it's not a very densely populated, at least section of the ship you're in. There's only a couple, literally a couple, maybe two or three people walking around. And they're not even right in a space right outside of you.
42:46
Let's kill him.
42:48
Why, Mr. Diplomacy?
42:51
They're imps. They're Imperials.
42:53
Yeah, but these guys are also part of the senators detail. And we want to get the Senator on our side. We don't want him, you know, like, to already be on the defensive with us.
43:03
All I'm saying is if an accident happens and this Imperial dies. Oh, wow.
43:09
Oh, the definition was for not. Is that what you're saying?
43:12
I prefer a stealthier approach.
43:14
All right, we'll go your way. But if things start to go rough, I'm ready.
43:18
We're all ready to fight. We've always been ready to fight.
43:20
All right, I'm just making sure we're not getting soft on these guys. I know what Slippery Jim said, but I also know Imperials are nasty, and if they need to die. All right, let's open this thing.
43:36
So on that word. Give me that roll.
43:37
30.
43:39
Door opens up. All right, so you guys come on board the ship. Could I have everyone give me. Move. Silently checks if you're going to try to stealth around. Or are you trying to stealth around? What is your plan?
43:53
Diplomacy.
43:54
Diplomacy. 14. 7.
43:59
10. Silently.
44:08
15.
44:10
Well, our. Our less humanoid friends on the. On this team are able to Racist.
44:17
Subtly come on board.
44:18
Fortunately, there's no one right where you guys are because the other two, our Zabrak and human compatriots are. Are fairly loud as they sort of walk on in. You don't trip, but you're just. The shift into artificial gravity causes you to kind of bring your feet down hard.
44:35
At least it's not like when Failures dropped that bag. That fuzzes the toll.
44:43
Hey, guys.
44:45
Yeah?
44:45
Moving silently isn't my skill set. All right, so what Are we gonna do.
44:50
We gotta get.
44:50
Where do we think this guy's gonna be? Is he gonna be on the bridge? Is he gonna be in his chambers? How do we know where he is? Do we have a map of this ship at all? Do we have any idea how to get around on this ship?
44:59
You guys, where's our arch?
45:01
Can you look at, like. Is there like a control panel somewhere that you can check at?
45:05
Yeah, there are terminals everywhere. All right. Yeah, very quickly. One of the chambers nearby has a control panel.
45:12
All right, let me pop that bad boy open and see what we got here.
45:15
23. All right, you bring up schematics of the ship.
45:18
All right.
45:20
I mean, this is a sort of a medium sized vessel. It's not, you know, like a Star Destroyer or some big thing like that, but it's on a personal size ship as well. So there's offices, there's living quarters, there's a mess hall, and then towards the front is the actual bridge. You don't have any sort of readout on who is where in this ship, but you do have a current estimate of the actual crew, and the crew is only 30 people, which is pretty low for a ship this size. And that includes the. The personnel that are not necessarily essential to the actual mission.
45:55
How many of those do you think would. Would be Stormtroopers? Or is that something we'd know from like. Like the manifest? Can we see the manifest to see who all's on board?
46:05
That would be a straight intelligence check, looking at the information in front of you, right?
46:13
I don't know.
46:14
Go ahead.
46:14
You do it. It wasn't my idea,.
46:21
But thanks for.
46:21
Letting me have the offer.
46:23
18.
46:24
Okay. Searching through the records, you note that there is no actual listed Stormtroopers on board. There are guards, but they're not Stormtroopers. This is his personal group. It's not like a military unit, so in fact, it is an actual Alderaan vessel. While they are all working for the Imperium, none of them are actually. Or rather, it's not just a straight up military vessel in that sense. It is a transport.
46:59
Yeah, high end transport.
47:01
Yeah, this is more bureaucratic.
47:04
A diplomatic ship. And then where is the diplomat?
47:15
That is not to say they're not guards, just that they're. Right.
47:17
They're not troopers. Yeah, they're not troopers.
47:19
Okay.
47:20
All right, we want to try his. His quarters.
47:23
Yeah, I think. Because I'd rather not go on the bridge because I don't know what kind of Imperial.
47:27
That's where we're gonna Find the most resistance.
47:30
Now, his quarters are near the bridge. You're gonna have to, at the very least, go past the mess hall. I think I should stand here and keep guard.
47:38
Just so you know, guys, from where.
47:40
You are, you will pass several offices as well as some compartments of living quarters, which, given the fact that they just arrived, there's no reason to think that anyone's going to need sleep. Sleeping at this time, pretty much. It's a. Again, it's a small crew, so those living quarters are probably unoccupied. However, the offices might be occupied. And just beyond that is the mess hall, and beyond that is the bridge. There are several paths.
48:10
Where is his office?
48:12
His office is up past the mess hall by the bridge.
48:15
No matter what office or living quarters, they are adjacent. No matter what, we gotta get past the mess hall and past all those offices and living quarters. And we have to get near the bridge if we want to get to either his office or his living quarters. Or we could just go to the bridge.
48:31
If you were doing a straight walk that way.
48:33
Yeah.
48:36
So there's a way to. To get to that without going by the mess hall. If the mess hall is going to be like, what. What time? Like, is it eating time?
48:46
Like, do we know what time?
48:47
Any kind of reference about, like, would it be eating time? Or like, is the mess hall likely to have people in it at this time?
48:55
I would check the ship's clock, see what the schedule is.
48:59
Computer use is 20.
49:03
All right. You're able to figure out that this is sort of the tail end of what their breakfast period would be as were arriving into this space.
49:11
Okay.
49:13
In all likelihood, most people would be done. There might still be some people kind of grabbing coffee or whatnot. Like, came to their, you know, had an early shift, and then is take. Are taking breaks to refresh.
49:29
Any ideas, guys?
49:30
If we go past the living quarters,.
49:33
Is there a way for us to.
49:35
Find clothes to, like, kind of blend in?
49:37
Potentially that's not a bad idea.
49:40
We can go get some clothes. So we could move around.
49:43
But is it the living quarters also pass the mess hall?
49:46
I think the living quarters are first and then the mess hall.
49:48
The. I said there are some living quarters.
49:50
Oh, okay.
49:51
Yeah. Plus, it's a guardian.
49:53
You're relatively middle of the ship, and.
49:55
They're gonna find clothes up towards the.
49:57
Where some of the senior officers have living quarters. And I'm the only one who could fit in. I'm human.
50:01
I look like I'm from Alderaan.
50:03
Maybe you're the Only one who has to go.
50:04
You're the one with the most, and I have great diplomacy.
50:07
Yeah.
50:07
Wait, he's human?
50:08
Yes. Look at me, baby.
50:10
Short tongue, remember? Short tongue.
50:13
All right, let's do that. All right, so let's find. Let's find the closest living quarters and the most discreet way to get to that living quarter.
50:25
All right. Are all four of you going to go to this?
50:28
I feel like we need to be ready to make an exit or if we need to fight, but we should stay here. Yeah, let's, because I think we'll attract attention if you just standing all. You idiot.
50:40
Come with me and hide in the room.
50:44
Okay. Yeah, that sounds good. Nice.
50:51
You're gonna attract attention just hanging out in the hallway. You three aliens.
50:54
Yeah, I think that'll be a little weird if, like, Zabrak is suddenly on this altar.
50:58
Whereas if we're. As if we're. Hi. We guys can hide out in the room. I can get some clothes, switch out, and then go do the diplomacy meeting.
51:04
And if he dies.
51:06
But I'm just saying, I'm a little.
51:07
Worried about you going into this.
51:09
And then.
51:10
And then we can. We can make this work. Well, you guys hide out there, and then. And then maybe we can make it.
51:15
Look like Stimbolt over there is sort of like his assistant to go along with.
51:21
No, they would know that, like, there's only 30 people on the ship. They would remember if there was a Zabrak that was. Was boarding the ship with them. There's no way you guys can do this.
51:29
All right, everyone, give me spot checks.
51:36
23.
51:39
See a pimple again, which is amazing.
51:43
We got to keep him with us. This is even more reason. Just go to the room.
51:47
What did we bring him that you see?
51:49
Nothing.
51:49
Considering that all you're doing is looking down a hallway, I kind of feel.
51:54
Like we should go into the room and knock him out just so he's all right.
51:59
So you are very clearly able to see what looks like a small living chamber just down the hallway from you. Do you all move as one? Does just one of you go to check out the scene?
52:11
Should all move as one.
52:12
No, no, no. Let me go check.
52:14
No, we're not gonna pay attention to this shit.
52:16
I will go and check it out, make sure everything's cool. I'll just stick my head in real quick. If they see a human head, they're not gonna freak out.
52:22
No, they'd freak out for a Zabrak.
52:24
Yes, they would.
52:27
Well, they would.
52:28
That's crazy, guys. Zabracks are scary.
52:33
I go to the other side of the street.
52:34
If I see one, can I have faileas Vag killer. Give me a move. Silently check. Oh, God.
52:41
11.
52:45
You are able to make it over to the room without attracting too much attention. You see that there are two bunks in here, workstations, and also several sets of clothes.
52:55
Yes.
52:57
All right. From the room, you are able to look out and see if there's anyone coming. Some people have passed by. There's a cross hallway, and you see some people down in the distance. Give me a spot check to see if you can I see an opening.
53:14
19.
53:16
All right, you see an opening and you're able to wave everyone over. Could I have everyone give me move silently checks to get to the room. Come on, guys.
53:24
Over here.
53:26
Make sure I don't trip on my ears. 14.
53:31
Damn it, J Mike.
53:34
17.
53:34
It's always disaster.
53:35
Thank you.
53:36
It's always the Zabrak 2.
53:39
Wait, what? Oh, that's awesome. It wasn't. Oof. This time, faux show.
53:50
As your two compatriots are having trouble moving as quickly, particularly your Zabrak friend, you start to see a person coming round one of the hallways and about to turn and look directly at you. They're a little bit down the ways. Are you able to sort of distract their attention the other direction?
54:10
I'm gonna do affect mine and just have them turn the other. Take a right turn. I think that they need to take a right turn instead and go towards the mess hall. We'll say sure. 20.
54:26
All right, this person who looks like who's about to turn down your way to sort of, like, does an about face and goes the other direction, and you're all able to make it into the room and shut the door without being spotted.
54:43
Be very dude. Stealth mission. Stealth mission. Look who's talking.
54:51
Good point.
54:51
Good point.
54:53
All right, I'm gonna grab clothes so I look like a Alderaan and not all the wrong places.
55:01
So that's your plan. Let me just, like, outline exactly what you plan to do.
55:05
I'm gonna dress up so that I look like one of the members of the ship, and then I am going to. So that will allow me to move more freely across. Across the ship, find this guy, use my diplomacy to explain to him the situation, show him the video, and attempt to turn him and then get back to these guys. And, you know, hopefully, if it goes well, we don't have to fight our way off the ship. We can just leave the ship. Or if it goes badly we fight our way off the ship and take over the ship and keep it.
55:41
Is there a new ship?
55:43
Watch him and monitor him to make sure that he doesn't think anything crazy. I don't like this. Potentially, let's go peacefully.
55:49
But that's just plan B.
55:52
Plan B is we take the ship.
55:54
Plan A is we have to fight anyway. Might as well just.
55:57
With how clumsy we've been today, I don't know how we feel. I feel like he just made a bunch of noise on this ship.
56:06
You did do that. That's not cool.
56:08
Anyway, I don't know how he ran into all those pans. They weren't even in the hallway.
56:13
I found your way. So, Failures, I guess you gotta strip and get into the uniform.
56:24
Yeah, baby. Check it out.
56:27
Zip F. Why are you carrying bricks in your.
56:33
Oh, you know, failures. You get changed into the uniform of, like, these Alderaan soldiers and put on a hat so no one can quite see your face and open up the door to step out and see how far you can get.
56:55
What are the odds? I make it.
56:59
A million to one.
56:59
Never tell me the odds.
57:02
So you're saying the same thing. And on that note, we're going to end the session.
57:05
That boy was our last hope. No, there's another.
57:13
Okay, now we devolve into just reference. But on that note, we are ending the session.
57:22
So we will find out what happens with these guys and our Alderaan diplomat on the next episode of the Scruffy Nerf Herders. While you're waiting, don't forget you can check out the rest of the episodes of the Scruffy Nerf Herders if you haven't caught up with all of them. And share the series with a friend. All of the episodes are on our website, certainpov.com, you can subscribe to this podcast and to other podcasts, and you can also let us know what you think of our adventures. And if you have suggestions, maybe you can feed Corey some Star wars lines for him to use as well.
57:53
Dude, I had Star wars lines the whole time.
57:58
All of our social media.
57:59
Feel lucky, punk. Drake.
58:02
All of our social media is on our website, certainpov.com and until next week, stay scruffy. My nerve. Herders.
58:11
CPOV certainpov.com.