Session 13 - Welcome to Fabulous Kwenn Space Station
Our nerfherders are on the way to Alderaan, but need to make a stop at Hutt owned space station for some gambling and a favor. They end up in deeper poo doo than expected.
Time Codes
Mission to Alderaan (04:28)
Equipment Needs from the Hutt (06:20)
Imperial Presence and Risks (11:00)
Casino Activities and Tournament (20:42)
Transcription
00:09
Hey, Nerf Herders. I'm Adi Thomas.
00:10
And I'm Ben Milton.
00:11
Thanks for joining us for an episode of Scruffy Nerf Herders. We are continuing the adventures of our scruffy band of rebels following the battle of the first Battle of Yavin. And you can, of course, catch up on all of the episodes if, for whatever reason, you're listening to this episode first. All of the episodes are at our website, certainpov.com. While you're there, you can also check out all of our other podcasts, which are now separated into their own feeds. Certain point of View is in its own news. Nerd news feed. We've got another pass with Case, our dungeon master, who revisits movies, whether they're good or bad, and tweaks them up a little bit. And of course, this show, the Scruffy nerf herders, our D20 Star Wars RPG adventure.
00:56
All of that is on our website, certainpov.com all right, well, let's quickly introduce our characters. First, I am Fosho, the Force adept.
01:07
And Ben, I am playing Phallus Voskiller, the human fringer, who is sort of a survivalist out here on the Outer Rim.
01:15
Then we got Corey.
01:17
I am currently a Gungan soldier. And. And your name Hu flung. Dumb is my name after 12 episodes.
01:28
And a movie. And then J. Mike. I am Stem Bolt. Tenure. And I am a tech specialist.
01:36
And then, of course, the God of our game, our dungeon master.
01:39
What race are you?
01:40
Zabrak. Zabrak.
01:42
That's the ones with the horns on their heads, right? Yeah, like Darth Maul.
01:44
Okay.
01:45
All right.
01:46
Yeah. And then, of course, our dungeon master, the God of our game, Case.
01:50
Thank you, Addie. Thank you. Sean, unfortunately couldn't be with us again for this recording, but he will be back soon.
01:57
Out for Sean.
01:58
Yep. But could I have everyone give me a D20 roll for the recap?
02:06
Damn it.
02:06
I got a 1917.
02:09
Freaking Sweet 11.
02:11
I saw that 17 and panicking.
02:16
Well, I guess I could be XP. Thank you for doing honesty.
02:20
Thank you for your honest. I was about to lie. All right, so last time on the Adventures of the Scruffy Nerf Herders. Fortunately, K's already just kind of helped us recap.
02:34
So I don't know how this works. Addie, you edited the episode.
02:37
I know this is a little embarrassing.
02:39
It was a little tough getting through the end. I was falling asleep. I took a break. I had to take a nap and then come back to it. And I finished getting the music to it and export And I fell asleep just as I uploaded it. So, yeah, it was a little bit of a struggle to get that last episode.
02:55
Oh my God, man.
02:58
So this time, though, fortunately, I just needed a couple details to wrap it up. Cause I know that the last episode we spent with our hacker buddies Pico and Garth. And I had a really weird, sensitive moment with Garth in the last episode too.
03:11
Do you remember that? There were a lot of sensitive moments, but you had some nice ones where you actually were connecting on a very emotional level with them. Right. In addition to connecting with your powers in the space. That was really cool too.
03:23
I've been watching a lot of Harmon Quests, so I've been taking some tips and notes. So we have been on a satellite, an Imperial satellite, to hack it. The plan was to hack it and to keep track of Imperial signals. But then we found out some information that we realized that the Empire can't know were there. So we destroyed the satellite. Heading out onto our next mission. To Alderaan.
03:48
Yep, that's a pretty. Pretty good explanation of what.
03:53
Thanks, Case.
03:56
Way to parrot back exactly what he said.
04:02
So you guys are aboard the Cosmopolitan Swift. And you are heading away from satellite I175. We've got Finn Deer pickup piloting the ship up front. And then the debriefing room. Yes, very slowly. Which is why certain routes might not make sense if you look at a star chart. But they do to him. They do to him.
04:26
I think it's just the way his eyes work. It's just he's got a different view of the galaxy.
04:31
Yeah, a straight line for him is a fork. But Slippery Jim the Gungan rapscallion captain of the ship, comes out to you guys and is. Alright, so I know that at the end of our time aboard the i175 satellite, I said all dramatically that we're headed to Alderaan. We got a bit of a pit stop.
04:55
Okay.
04:56
Mostly because I got a pee. I think you guys are all aware, Alderaan no longer exists.
05:03
Wait, what?
05:03
It's. It's an asteroid field now.
05:07
All right, I did hear that.
05:08
Yeah. You know. Wait, we're in space? You said discredit to our race.
05:20
That's not even in the game.
05:27
Use a good fighter. But use. It's a good thing. It's a good thing you got the looks and your tongue. Because otherwise.
05:40
That sounded really dirty. Do we have an HR department on this ship?
05:46
You start looking at it,.
05:50
Might as well get naked.
05:51
Anyway. It was that kind of party, huh? We used to kind of need to get some supplies if we're going to what used to be a planet. It's a kind of a dangerous thing. Like, yeah, were just in an asteroid field, but we knew where were going and we knew what had to be done. And were actually following a distress beacon. It was pretty easy to get to and whatnot. But we're gonna need some equipment that is not easy to come by and gonna have to buy it off the huts.
06:22
Oh, fire extinguishers. Not easy to kill.
06:25
Yeah, we're definitely gonna need some fire extinguishers.
06:27
We're definitely going to need some fire extinguishers, my friend, but hopefully it will not be used on us.
06:35
Some fire extinguishers, because all these items are going to be hot for getting them from the huts.
06:43
Jesus Christ. Felius, you. You are correct.
06:50
Thank you.
06:51
Thank you. So you need a lot more diplomacy to make these jokes work.
06:58
So it happens when we play the game sober.
07:03
Yeah, because before that would have really gotten a laugh.
07:05
So I got Finder piloting us to the Quinn space station orbiting the planet Quinn, because those people have no imagination. And we're going to head there and hopefully Wisa can get in, get out, talk to some middle people without having to talk to any of the top heads, because it's not good for any of us.
07:24
All right, sounds good. Do we have a contact?
07:27
I know someone. Yeah. Yes, I know a couple someones, but hopefully we only got to talk to the one.
07:32
All right, cool. What do you need us to do, Slippery Jim?
07:35
Well, I'm going to need Reggie to come to watch my back, and I'm going to probably want the. My dangly force adept friend to come with us as well, since he seems to be able to look around corners that not without sticking out his head. And I don't know. I just don't want to get shot. So a couple of you guys who think you can lay low a little bit while we go out there, not attract too much attention, and I don't.
08:03
Know, you need to stay on the ship.
08:05
Yeah, you stay on the ship, you go nowhere.
08:08
First moment that happens, he's gonna jump into a fight. Pimple.
08:16
Why do you always look out the window and only see your. It's some sort of terrible metaphor for the state of our race.
08:29
To my family, Is there a. Is there a casino on this planet since the huts are there?
08:35
Well, first up, as I said, we are not going to the planet. We are going to the space station that orbits it. And yeah, of course it's the huts.
08:42
Yeah.
08:43
What are you talking about?
08:44
All right, cool. Well, I'm just gonna hang out there then and see if we can gather some intel.
08:49
Okay. I'm going to executive decision. Say that Hoof is your God while you go over there.
08:55
I got your back.
08:57
Just to keep him out of the way.
08:59
All right, I promise not to trip.
09:01
Over my ears this time, my Zebrak friend. Why don't you come as well with. Actually, you know what? You go gamble with your friends.
09:09
Great.
09:10
Yeah, yeah, you go gamble.
09:11
All right.
09:14
Alright, so if you guys blow this.
09:15
For me, I'll be so pissed.
09:17
Reggie and Fauchell, you guys come with me. We will keep the engines hot, so hopefully we don't have to be there that long. And the rest of you guys go act normal like tourists. So they think, yeah, they're just here for some gambling and maybe some drugs and, you know, it's like space Tijuana. Alright, alright.
09:39
Space Tijuana. I like it already.
09:42
It's like the happiest place on earth.
09:48
It's just dirt.
09:51
My gungans.
09:59
And we have a nice sort of wipe as the ship slowly chugs through space.
10:06
A week later, I need to start.
10:09
Having music stingers for our wipes.
10:14
And the ship pulls up, or finally, after what seems like forever, pulls up to this massive multi tiered space station. The planet itself is alive, but not like super developed. The space station itself is the hub of all traffic coming in and out. It's twinkling with just lights all over it. It's clearly a hub of activity. There's docking bays all over windows that sh. With activity as you approach it. It's. It's truly. It's a. It's a metropolis in space. If you think about Fossa's Atoll, that was just like a little dive. This is. Like I said, it's just massive and truly impressive. But everyone who's looking at windows, please give me perception checks.
11:07
Oh, sweet.
11:09
A chance to redeem myself. Yep. Nope, nevermind.
11:14
Well, the 18's probably good enough to point this out to the rest of you guys. I got a seven. I was kind of curious if you.
11:20
Saw my reflection again.
11:22
Yep.
11:24
Jma, I mean, Stibble, what'd you get? I got a nine. Oh, nine.
11:28
Yeah, man, you guys are really.
11:29
I did not hear your nine.
11:31
He's like, ooh, look at that. You come over and just like, that's a really nasty one. Since you're such a helpful guy, you're like trying to help him pop it.
11:42
Meanwhile.
11:43
Meanwhile, Fosh. Joe looks past the pimple and sees a Star Destroyer docked.
11:49
Oh. Oh snap. Guys, we got company. Got a Star Destroyer. Doesn't really matter as much when it's water.
12:00
Yeah, I feel much more hydrated now.
12:02
About to get high drated.
12:10
What do you see?
12:11
A Star Destroyer.
12:14
Yes, there's a Star Destroyer docked in the station right now. So we've got a lot of company.
12:18
It's probably right beside us too. As far as I can tell, there's no reason to think that they are here for us, right? Why would they think that we'd be coming this way now? Well, after we should have come through here. Based on any other travels, I think.
12:37
We're cool, you guys.
12:39
We're just gonna have to be aware.
12:40
Yeah, just fly casual. We should just remember this is Hutt territory. Thank you. For those at home drink, this is Hutt territory. So it's not like they're just here willy nilly. They're here probably for something. And probably gonna take a quick look over, see that it's a weird ragtag group of spacefarers. But this is just a weird pleasure yacht that clearly has been turned into criminal activities. And more likely than not, they're here for some sort of rebel activity.
13:17
All right, well, luckily we're not rebels, so.
13:19
That's right. Yeah, right. That's right. We're not rebels. We're just a bunch of scoundrels.
13:24
That's right.
13:24
Exactly.
13:24
Yeah.
13:25
Just making our way across the universe.
13:26
You might even call us a scruffy bunch of nerf headers. I like where you're going with that.
13:31
Slippery Jim.
13:32
That's a good name.
13:33
Yeah, we should use that.
13:36
So, yeah. So we stick to the plan. We stick to the plan. Finn, dear, Just keep it going, okay? Thanks, man. Chug.
13:46
Three weeks later, we dock.
13:50
It wasn't that convenient. The Star Destroyer left, but oh no, sorry, it backed up. And they're just using shuttles going back and forth. I'm sorry. It's kind of weird for a Star Destroyer proper to dock. Actually, it's really big.
14:04
It is really big.
14:07
But actually this space station, just for scale is bicker.
14:12
Is that a Star Destroyer or a Super Star Destroyer?
14:14
It's not a Super Star Destroyer. It's one of the smaller size Star Destroyers.
14:17
Okay.
14:19
No, we can totally take it. We should steal it.
14:24
I did not plan to die today. There's still like a thousand people on that ship.
14:32
They won't notice.
14:34
It's huge.
14:35
Everyone dies. No one truly lives.
14:39
I don't Know what that means?
14:41
Can we cut that part out? It sounded better.
14:44
Reggie said you thought you were, like, ready to go into the breach. Right then and there I was just.
14:49
Thinking Braveheart all of a sudden.
14:50
Yeah, no, Reggie's is like.
14:51
Yeah, man.
14:52
Yeah.
14:55
Takes me back to the. To the brain things that he put into me while I was growing up.
15:00
No, he's dirtier than he intended.
15:02
I think that's all.
15:04
What he does.
15:05
In his free time is his business.
15:06
My free time is done with terrible memories. Well, that got dark.
15:13
All right, let's get to that casino.
15:15
Let's dock this bad boy already, you guys. Well, that sounds like a good plan. Why don't you guys head towards the casino? Yep.
15:23
I'm gonna gamble big.
15:24
Can I borrow some?
15:25
No.
15:25
Come on, man.
15:26
No, please, Fender. Your docks, the ship.
15:28
No.
15:30
And you come on board. There's customs, obviously, because this is a much more sophisticated trading outpost than what you guys have normally been coming to. But fortunately, Sleepery Jim, the smuggler extraordinaire that he is, has prepped falsified documents for everyone. So you guys are able to come on in and they're all like. Is this for business or pleasure?
15:57
Oh, pleasure.
15:58
Oh, sure.
15:59
What kind of pleasure are you here for? The gambling. Or possibly our world renowned prostitution?
16:03
A little A, perhaps a little B. Do you have Wookies?
16:07
Unfortunately not. That delicacy is usually reserved for the outer rims.
16:11
Okay, well, you know, it never hurts to ask, my friend.
16:15
Well, fortunately for you, if you're going to be trying to cut over to the Corellian run, Kashyyyk is actually on the way.
16:22
Oh, that's an excellent point. But I doubt I'm gonna find Wookiee love on Kashy.
16:27
But fortunately, and very fortunately, we have plenty of Rodian girls here. Oh, and with a Rodian, you always shoot first.
16:52
All right, well, okay. All right, good to know. Can you point me the direction of the, I guess the casino?
17:02
Not even drunk guys.
17:08
Oh, yeah. You go up 50 flights and fortunately there is an escalator over there.
17:14
Did you say escalator?
17:16
Well, yes, of course.
17:17
50 Flights.
17:18
Yes. Okay. There's onboard TVs that ride up along with it.
17:22
Oh, excellent.
17:23
Cool. You'll be able to tune into all kinds of fun then.
17:25
Do you have sports?
17:27
We have some gladiatorial games that go on and in fact, actually there's some anticipatory pod races that are going to be activating soon.
17:35
Oh, I'm going to pass on the pod races. Wait, are we Gladiatorial games hosted here.
17:42
We do have an arena. There's none going on today, but tomorrow morning is actually the start of a session of them.
17:50
Oh, guys, we got to go. I've always wanted to see one of these live. I watch all the time.
17:56
Sure. You know, we are only a fortnight away from Bunta Eve really. And there's plenty of celebrations being done in anticipation of that.
18:04
That's an excellent point. Guys, we're totally getting in on this. Come on, let's head to the casino. We'll make some wagers and kill some time and then maybe tomorrow morning we'll.
18:11
Get up and we'll go to the arena.
18:13
All right, I'm game.
18:14
You guys want to do it?
18:16
Let's do it.
18:17
I'm with Reggie.
18:18
Yeah, it's the three of us.
18:19
Idiot princess used to looking for him.
18:22
Yeah, let's do it.
18:23
Let's do it.
18:24
Let's make magic happen. To the casino.
18:26
Sure. Go to the casino and if you speak to them there, they can definitely set you up with. Sorry. Do you want to participate or just observe? Tickets to observe are readily available. We're excited to have all the people watching. But if you wish to participate, there is an introductory challenge that they'll make you do. Want to do it?
18:48
You want to do it?
18:48
Let's do it.
18:49
Are you in?
18:49
I'm in.
18:50
Are you in?
18:50
I'm in.
18:51
Ready to roll some D?
18:52
Let's do it.
18:53
We're gonna enter. He's gonna enter.
18:58
It's always fun to see a Gungan get shot down.
19:02
That's my favorite pastime.
19:03
Oh, don't worry. It's all non lethal combat.
19:05
Shut down. Oh, it's non lethal?
19:07
Yes, yes.
19:07
It's got a whole lot less interesting.
19:09
It's only lethal in the highest ranks. Only if you're a multi time champion do they allow for a lethal battle. Usually it's just sport. Wait, wait.
19:20
How long are we planning on being here?
19:23
I didn't think it was.
19:24
That is a question you should be asking yourselves and then telling me because I.
19:30
Why are you asking the customs?
19:32
I mean, I understand that many of our less reputable clients come here with no particular time frame in mind, but I really don't feel like that's a question you should be asking me. I feel like we're gonna. I feel like we're gonna go for.
19:44
What's your name again?
19:46
My name is Kezlek Sazer.
19:49
Kezlek Sazer, you have been just a gem of a. What race Is he.
19:57
A Zabrak?
19:58
I'm a Zabrak. Of course.
20:00
Yes, a Zabrak.
20:03
Look at these two horny bastards.
20:05
Yeah, I'm just jealous.
20:08
All right, well, hey, listen, is there anything else you can like? Anything else you suggest while we're here? Just for pleasure?
20:17
Well, let's see. You said you didn't care for the pod racing.
20:21
Definitely not pod racing.
20:22
That's a totally understandable thing. There are the spas.
20:27
Hut ball.
20:28
Shut up.
20:31
We have world renowned spas. They are designed to imitate the atmospheric conditions of Nal Hutta. And so it's truly invigorating and at the same time terrifying. Best of both worlds. Oh, yeah. They do interesting things with Mynox and Npples. And as you know, with us Zabrax. It's a weird time.
20:54
Wow.
20:55
He knows.
20:55
Look at that smile on his face.
20:59
You should have looked at how.
21:00
Please, Beth, Phelius over here. Was his eyes rolled back a little bit.
21:06
Oh, my Zabrak friend. You know what they say about us Zabrax. We might be corny, but we're definitely horny.
21:15
So let's go to the casino, guys.
21:17
All right.
21:21
Got an easy way out with hutball, Ben.
21:24
Oh man. Okay, you two, zip it back up.
21:28
And put the rulers away.
21:29
Let's go. All right, so we're gonna cut away.
21:33
That was fantastic.
21:35
So for sure. I've been kind of interested in how user able to do things with what they call the Force, right? It's that thing out there. I don't. I don't understand. It's. It's a thing out there, right?
21:51
Yeah, it's sort of the. Well, it's not quite the Jedi way, is it?
21:57
Like a space jellyfish.
21:59
Space jellyfish in the sky that. That sees everything and binds everything. It's not really quite like that.
22:04
It's not like the tendrils do not bind through. I was led to believe that it was some sort of like that the world was truly watered. Like I was taught as a young lad on Naboo.
22:16
I've heard that before with my people, the Kel Dor. We believe it's the spirits of wind that carry the force that binds through all elements and interacts with all elements.
22:29
Oh, that is an interesting way to look at things. As an amphibious race, we had always been taught to respect the water from which we emerge as guppies. But it is cool to see that there are other perspectives, especially from such a gas breathing one such as yourself. Can we get on with this, guys? Oh, Reggie, come On now, we should just make a small talk. This is a 50 floor escalator. Ride up to the bar so that we can try to incognito, meet up with my contacts, but for sure some more because we have a long way to go.
23:13
That's true. Well, Reggie, what Jedi Commander did you fight under?
23:23
Please don't ask me that.
23:25
All right, Reggie.
23:26
I'll make sure to avoid that in the future.
23:31
Please. Oh, you're making me think about bad times.
23:34
Well, we had one of our famous Kel Dor Force users did become a Jedi Master. But the way we look at the Force is very different from the Jedi. We have more of this thought of different gods and different spirits were carried on the wind to teach us different things, that the world and the universe was created basically by the Force and by these different Gods that reached out and tried to create order out of chaos. So it was something were raised at with a child. We lived outside of what the Jedi Order was like. So that's why were able to escape the Jedi purge that the Empire did.
24:20
That is interesting. I was wondering because the, you know, you don't see a lot of people who are able to do the movie thing with the mind them, right.
24:28
And we only got very basic training because we had to stay in hiding for the most part. And we had to. We had to run pretty soon from Keldor as well, from the Keldor planet, because the Empire was after Force users, and they sent people after anyone who was known to be Force sensitive.
24:46
Oh, that's so. That's so sad. Did you wish to become a Jedi at some point?
24:53
No. We just found early on, when I was about maybe eight, that I had Force powers. And I trained with one of the Baran do masters. Our Baron do is our order of Force users. And they're the ones who train all of our Force users and teach us sort of the different gods who teach us about the Force and how it works and sort of the ideas of controlling and working within the Force because there's different schools of. Of thought as far as whether we should just work with the Force or work and try to control and manipulate it. And sometimes that leads to things that can sort of hurt us. There's certain powers that sometimes we use and we take. We actually feel sort of pain when we. When we try to work, when we use it.
25:47
So like there were just earlier in sort of our travels, we. I use the Force to try to cast fear. And some stormtroopers and I suffered some physical Damage while trying to do that.
26:01
And you would take that damage in the name of a common cause?
26:06
Yes. Because knowing that what the Empire has done and how many sort of societies and communities and families they fractured, it's worth doing. It's worth taking that sacrifice to be able to. To take down the Empire.
26:24
Interesting. Interesting. I'm always kind of curious about the people I travel with. And I can't really look you in the eye cause you got the weird things covering your faces. So it's curious to me. So, want to know more about you. You seem like an okay guy.
26:41
Thank you, Slippery Jim. Thank you for bringing us along with your adventures. You're a good guy too. As good as this universe can allow us.
26:51
You said don't know the dark things that I have had to do for the rebellion before. But this guy definitely knows and he taps on Reggie and Reggie's. Sorry, I was thinking about Master Satellite. All right, well, look, I don't like all this chit chat that's making me feel weird and hey, we're almost to the top here. So Sleeper Jim, who are we looking for? Oh, you'll know her when you see her, my friend. All right, could you give me a little bit more, my friend? She's tall and furry and very imposing when you see. But let's lets go over here. This little hidey hole looks like a spot for scum and villainy like the galaxy has never seen. Shall we all go in and have a drink?
27:55
Let's do it.
27:56
You sound like a smart fellow. And as you guys walk in, a human gets tossed out the door. And this Wookiee like storms out snarling like blaster pistol, ready to like fire at this person. So Majim's like, oh, we're in luck. We can. We don't actually have to have that drink. Garnak. Karnak. Hold up. Yes, I know it's jim. Hi, I have a fav.
28:32
Hi.
28:40
Yes, yes, I know it's been a long time. Look, if we don't have to talk to Kelsey, I would really appreciate it. I have a favor for you.
28:48
Groan.
28:54
I understand. I understand how this all works, but it would seriously better for everyone if. If we didn't have to talk to her. Okay, Okie day, guys. We're probably gonna have to go talk to Kelsey the Hutt. And with that, we're gonna cut back to the other guys. So you guys have been riding up the escalator All 50 stories.
29:33
All 50 stories.
29:34
Look at me. I can run drink service on this.
29:36
Escalator, if those were Star Trek, they'd be like replicators, but it'd also have transporters.
29:42
Hey, vag filler. My documents say my name is Wayne. Too fat.
29:47
Isn't that cool?
29:48
Yeah, it's fantastic.
29:50
Called vag filler.
29:57
So guys, We had this deep conversation about the nature of gods in someone's.
30:12
Life and like.
30:15
Head filler.
30:24
Nailed it, nailed it.
30:28
So you guys arrive at the top of the escalator because I'm guessing you don't have any particular things that you were trying to tune into.
30:36
Oh no, we were. I wanted to see ranker wrestling.
30:38
Oh yeah, definitely. So yeah. So Andreze the Giant Rancor. Was taking on the people's champion Hukana Hogan. And it was this brutal match ultimately resulting in this very stop motiony leg drop that took.
31:06
Oh awesome. Fantastic.
31:08
It was really impressive. It was like, the effects were great.
31:11
Oh wow. But that was amazing.
31:13
All right, well I'm going to stretch and not at all retouched with CGI or anything.
31:16
No, of course not. No, no. I'm going to switch over to Sabik After Dark though.
31:20
Okay. Yeah, yeah. So here you see a bunch of players. There's a lot of good chit chat and a very comely Twi' lek sort of reporting on the actual plays. A couple players have gotten up from the table and have headed over to sort of like speak their mind about what's going on over there. It's like, well obviously you can see what their cards are if you just know what you're doing. No force sensitive powers at all. You can just read them very clearly. You know, all it takes is a little bit of training, a little bit of knowledge and you can just read them like a book. As long as you're not in the hand. If you're in the hand, you're just playing blind dumb.
31:53
Oh, interesting, huh? Is there any players I recognize? If you can't fuck with a dm,.
32:07
What's the point in playing?
32:11
I'm gonna need another slice.
32:12
Cory.
32:15
Fleel Darksidemuth is currently.
32:19
You wanna say that a second time?
32:21
Fleel Darksidemuth is currently up against Danrez Negron Killer in a heated heads up exchange.
32:35
Oh yeah, I'm guessing that was it. Negron Killer.
32:40
Yes. Daniel.
32:42
Daniel Negron Killer's probably playing with two off suit cards.
32:49
That is a very likely scenario. But in this particular game they're not doing whole cards until after the hand is over.
32:57
After the hand is over. Interesting. Okay, all right. Wow. It's a new twist on something.
33:01
All right, cool. Yeah. Do you know what we're watching?
33:03
I haven't.
33:03
No idea.
33:04
All right, well, we got 50 floors of this, guys. Get used to it.
33:07
No, I'm going to walk down.
33:10
I'm going to walk down.
33:10
While we're going up, switch back to ranker wrestling, see if there's another match.
33:14
On anyway, I guess not. My knowledge of wrestlers is so horrifically. I had a better shot at doing more poker players.
33:34
You done good, kid. You done good.
33:37
That was worth it.
33:37
Anyway, so you guys come finally to the top of the escalator.
33:46
Oh, thank God.
33:48
And you see a squadron of stormtroopers actually hauling away a bunch of people in chains or handcuffs, as it were. But at the top, there's a stormtrooper kind of like waving people into the casino, being like, nothing to see here. Move along, move along. And does this strike your interest? What do you guys think?
34:11
We're gonna keep moving. Cause I love the smell of commerce in the morning. Let's go have some fun, guys.
34:18
All right. Do you guys have a particular thing that you want to go do? Yeah, we're gonna. The casino, by the way, Kevin Smith reference is not a drink.
34:25
No, I still. It didn't stop me. Is there a kid on the escalator?
34:44
Actually, you hear a scream and all the stormtroopers suddenly turn to go look. And in fact, one of the people that's in handcuffs makes a break for it and all the stormtroopers then turn and realize that they missed it and they have to run off after the guy. So then all of a sudden it seems to be fairly sparse of stormtroopers.
35:00
Oh, sweet. Okay.
35:02
But the kid died.
35:05
Where was his parents? Alright, let's. What's around us. Are there any stores or any. What's right here?
35:14
I mean. So this is the entrance to the casino. As with most casinos, they have all sorts of lavish places to waste your money on if you want it. So you can buy a vertu communicator or you could buy very expensive water, various types of beverages that are quote unquote, high end. Even though you could get the same basic quality product for only a few credits. But they're charging for thousands.
35:40
Oh, wow.
35:40
Thousands. Okay. There's also a nightclub. And you're pretty sure if you went into the nightclub and dropped the right amount of money, you could have some illicit fun. But you also know that it's legal here, so who really cares? Like there's. There's fun to be had everywhere.
35:53
All right, well, we're not gonna do that. Let's. I'm in the mood to gamble. Like, I have good gambling skill. I gotta put this to good use. Although for some reason, my credits aren't on my sheet. I don't remember how many I had worked up for.
36:05
You don't have any credits. That's terrible.
36:08
All right, I'm gambling.
36:09
Are you guys all gambling? I'm watching gambling.
36:11
Are there any hot chicks around us?
36:13
Yeah, there's. Well, hold on. Actually, there are not at first. If you start winning, there will be.
36:19
Win for the love and gun.
36:21
I'm just gonna walk around and watch.
36:22
All right, I'll check stuff out.
36:23
All right, here we go. Here we go. For gambling.
36:25
He's looking at people's feet. That's what he means.
36:27
Four people out with your gambling skill.
36:30
Oh, gambling skill there. That's right.
36:31
Yeah.
36:32
11.
36:34
Okay, you're breaking even at the moment. You're basically hanging out there while they bring you free drinks.
36:39
I love free drinks.
36:40
Oh, free drinks, right. Free drinks are only for the people playing, not for the people watching.
36:45
Ooh, you want me to spit this back into the cup?
36:48
Yes. Yes, I do. I want to see what that waitress does.
36:56
Okay, while you guys continue to gamble, we're gonna cut back over.
37:08
Slippery Jim. What brings you back here? Why you not call me hey, sir?
37:19
Kelsey, we, sir. We, sir, get a little caught up with the rebellion.
37:26
Oh, Jim. After the night we had together and.
37:31
Reggie kind of leans over and Dafoe, that's a hero. I was under the impression that they were hermaphroditic.
37:46
I thought it was like Kelsey like man. Kelsey like Kelsey Grammer, the Hut.
37:50
Yeah, sometimes it is. With Hutts, it's a little more complicated than that. They can reproduce asexually, but it involves a few steps. Otherwise, they tend to be whatever they kind of prefer.
38:06
Oh, Slippery Jim, we had such good times. You were a great buy it for me. And then after you made that run, that beautiful run, you showed me that wrong tongue of yours.
38:27
Yeah, I never wanted to be gambling so bad. Right now.
38:32
I think you are.
38:36
Misa got a little drunk after a pretty successful one. And when I woke up, I thought was I should go join the rebellion.
38:42
Eh, I guess. Yeah, you're right. You're right, Slippery Jim. We've all had dark places.
38:52
Is that his name?
38:53
Some of us don't stick our tongue in those dark places.
38:58
So, Kelsey, we have a bit of a thing. Thing that will give the empire a good old black eye if it works. Out successfully. And we kind of need a little bit of help. Particularly, we need a model reference 11837 asteroid implant.
39:26
Just give it to you after. After you just being my best pilot, making me think that you wanted to be something raw. And then showing up here a mere fortnight before Boonta Eve, knowing that I'd be feeling more generous. And you come here with a. I don't even know. What is that thing with the drudge?
39:59
That's you, Eddie. I'm a Kel Door. Most gracious. Kelsey.
40:04
Grammar. Grammar's not important here. All I really care is about my money. And I see that you have a clone with you. Where? I have news for you. So do I.
40:26
And Grannac walks in, flanked by two advanced battle droids from the Clone Wars. The ones that have the guns built into their arms, but on their chests are domes of water. And you see Reggie's face in those domes. It's two droids that have heads of clone troopers. And it's all wired up. The sensors of the head unit are all working. It's only like being powered by the brain. And it's just like floating in the water. Oh, that's dark.
41:02
You recognize my attempt to have more sophisticated artificial intelligence on my troops? I decided that the best way to do it was to have actual intelligence. Why not take the fighting power of the droids and have the combat proficiency of the clones?
41:29
Subragem. Is this our only way to get this?
41:32
Yes. You would just have to indulge it for a few minutes. I got this. It's fine. Actually, if you could do something with your talk to the wind, I think we will call it for the time being.
41:43
Sure.
41:43
Let me.
41:48
I just feel like I need to heal myself after seeing all this, hearing all this.
41:54
My friend, we can. We can debrief about this later if you really so care. But we need to tread carefully and quickly because the longer we are here, the more likely it will go one of three possible ways. And only one is a. Oh, let's just move quickly, my friends.
42:17
I want to use my telepathy to see if I can figure out what Kelsey wants most right now. To see if we can provide that.
42:27
Yeah, go for it.
42:29
Oh, God. I don't think that's. Don't be a tug. Don't be a tug. Oh, that did not go well. That's a four.
42:36
Oh, God damn it. You are not able to penetrate the strong will of the Hutt mind. You take two points of vitality damage and do not really ascertain anything. But the attempt itself is taxing on your mind and body.
42:58
Jim, I can't really see what Kelsey wants the most right now.
43:02
Yeah, but I can, fortunately. And I'm going to do my best to not give it Kelsey. Kelsey, you know, I know that it is almost the Eve of Munta. Eve. I know that you've got a lot of planning coming up. It's certainly wonderful to see you here around the holidays. We are just trying to give the Empire a black eye. And then we are hoping to. We are hoping to be on our way very quickly, as it were. I'm sure that you suffered a lot of business loss when Alderaan was lost. That's kind of what we wish to target.
43:45
Alderaan. The citizens of Alderaan were some of my best customers. You raise a good point. And as you said, it's nearly Bronte. I'll tell you what. Your friends can go. I wish to spend some time with you. To have some spacey time with you.
44:15
Spacey spacey time.
44:17
And your friends can hang out for a while and we'll make arrangements as.
44:23
Long as they don't run afoul. Love to improve yourself. In that time.
44:34
Wish I hadn't eaten Taco Bell.
44:39
I'm sure an arrangement could be made.
44:42
Wonder where my love will go.
44:45
Jackson. Okay, okay.
44:52
What if I was to be able to see if I could use my powers to see when the next window is for them to be able to smuggle some shipments past the Imperials?
45:07
What? What kind of creature thinks that there are no more Jedi left?
45:14
Not just Jedi. Have these powers.
45:20
Prove something to me. Do prove your powers to me.
45:28
I'm gonna use move object to lift up one of the droids.
45:33
Okay,.
45:35
Good roll.
45:36
Good roll. 20 Total or.
45:40
Oh, well, I guess 24.
45:42
Nice. Yeah. So you raise up one of the droids and it's like floating around there.
45:53
Kevin won these flout Rat. My stars. You're not full of it after all. Well then, Jim, you've made friends with some interesting people. Tell me, Keldor, what do you aim to do?
46:22
I believe you have some spice.
46:24
Please put my droid down first.
46:28
Believe you have some spice shipments that you want to get through an Imperial blockade.
46:34
It's the spice. Merlond is important to all of us. I would love to have a come in.
46:42
I can provide you the windows of time when you have an opportunity to be able to smuggle them.
46:52
If you could do that for me, I would very much appreciate it. But how will I know that time Window is apt. I currently have a Star Destroyer in orbit, so it will not be soon.
47:10
Well, you have communications with one of. With maybe a smuggler that is in your employ, maybe near Kessel to see when you can grab some shipments that are available even despite the blockade.
47:27
I am well connected. Indeed.
47:31
So you would just have this window available in time to be able to grab some. An unintended shipment right off of right from Kessel to be able to grab some of that spice so you wouldn't have to deal with the Star Destroyer here. It'd be to be able to obtain a shipment.
47:52
You propose an interesting situation. Perhaps we can discuss this more in private.
48:05
Star Wars Wipe.
48:12
And scene.
48:16
Okay, so we're gonna cut back to you guys.
48:18
I thought were gonna end the episode there.
48:20
Cause that is truly horrifying.
48:24
We're gonna come back to you guys. Are you going to go try to participate in this fighting ring? Is that what's going to happen? Actually, Ben, give me a quick gambling check just to see if you guys are up or down.
48:37
19 Plus 6.
48:40
Sounds like you guys are pretty up. I would say you've doubled your money. Yeah, me should. Try me.
48:44
So try.
48:45
No. No.
48:48
Okay, so you guys are. You guys, you're doing pretty well. You guys could go participate in these like, these tournaments that are going on. Yeah.
48:55
This is your shot. This is your chance to shine, Hoof. This is where you're really gonna shine. We're gonna put you in this tournament to fight.
49:02
First of all, my name's Wang.
49:03
Sorry, Wang Chung.
49:05
No. We're about to open up a can of Jackie Chan up here. Even though no one knows what that is.
49:10
Nope.
49:11
But we're gonna make it happen. Let's do it.
49:13
Let's take him over. All right, so you haul him over to like the registration booth and they're like, well, is he drunk?
49:19
No.
49:20
He probably should be.
49:21
Okay.
49:21
Okay, let's get it.
49:23
He's Gungan. It doesn't matter.
49:25
That's a fair point. Let's sign him up.
49:29
All right.
49:29
Okay, so we're gonna do. Are you gonna do blasters or swords?
49:36
I better do blasters.
49:37
Well, check your skills there, champion.
49:40
I don't know karate, but I know Kwesi.
49:42
All right, fair enough. We like to do either quick draw challenges.
49:50
You alright there, champ?
49:51
Sorry,.
49:53
What happened to my sheet?
49:56
All right, we like to do either quick draw challenges or Viro Blade face offs. So if you're preferring to do a blaster shot, that'll be just right. So tell you what, champ? Why don't we get you. Get you suited up and when in. In an hour's time, you'll be on stage in front of millions of audience members watching. Can we wager on this? Oh, absolutely. Seriously, how much can we put on this? Yeah, yeah.
50:33
What is your proficiency with blasters? Go down into world weaponses.
50:39
Weaponses.
50:40
Okay.
50:41
And then look for Blaster. Yep. And then what is your bonus on blaster tech?
50:46
Bonus is eight.
50:48
Oh, sweet. All right, all right, cool. I like where we're going with this. Where can we wager on this?
50:56
Right. Right here.
50:57
You're still. Take all my winnings. Wager this guy winning.
51:02
Really? On the winnings?
51:04
Not our whole lot, just the winnings.
51:06
So we'll call this a thousand credits that you're putting.
51:09
Sure will not let you down.
51:12
No, it won't.
51:13
Well, good. Well, good.
51:18
You blow this for me, you're not getting back on the ship.
51:24
And Star wars wife to the tournament stage itself, to the arena where who flung dung? It ready to, like, step out into battle. Blaster on his hip steps out. And across the way, a Rodian gunman starts to step up.
51:50
Too easy.
51:53
And we're gonna end the episode right there.
51:59
I'm totally sucked into that. Hopefully I don't get sucked into. Into something else.
52:09
Thanks, guys, for joining us on this adventure. You can check out more stuff on certainpoint of view.com or certainpov.com, right?
52:16
Yes, certainpov.com don't forget, all our social media is there. All of our podcast feeds are also there. We've split them out into separate feeds. You can find them@ certainpov.com don't forget, Patreon can also be a part of the podcast. If you really enjoy this, don't forget to share the podcast with your friends and family. All of that again is on our website, certainpov.com and until next week, stay scruffy. My Nerf burgers.
52:43
Cpov certainpov.com.