Session 24 - Turn After Reading
Case guides the Nerfherders through a fight and they are woefully outmatched. While the fight rages, Pho Sho reminisces about his friends as he must make a difficult choice to sacrifice a friend to his quest for power.
Scruffy Nerfherders Full Episode
Originally aired: April 26, 2018
Podcast Edited by Addy Thomas
Music: Purple Planet Music
Music: www.purple-planet.com
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⏱️ YouTube Chapters
00:09 Welcome and Intros
02:21 Recap Roll
03:07 Corey Recaps
05:07 Griff’s Master Appears
07:23 Klebold Pressures Pho Sho
08:39 The Revenant Fight
11:44 Droids Come Online
17:09 Flashback: Stembolt on the Swift
23:50 Back to the Fight
24:50 Pho Sho Helps Stembolt
27:56 Starting the Speeder
29:46 Flashback: Pho Sho and Phalleas
35:04 The Revenant’s Shockwave
40:50 Flashback: Hoof and Pho Sho
49:50 Pho Sho Makes His Choice
50:35 Griff Falls
51:35 Outro
Transcription
00:00
Corey
Foreign.
00:09
Addy
Hey, Nerf Herders. I'm Adi Thomas.
00:11
Ben
I am Ben Milton.
00:12
Jmike
I am J. Mike Folson.
00:13
Corey
I am Corey Putnam.
00:15
Case
And I'm Case Aiken.
00:15
Addy
Thanks for joining us for another episode, another adventure of the scruffy Nerf Herders, a Star Wars D20 story. We'll continue our story in just a moment, but don't forget to check out all of our podcasts at our website. Certain people just go to our website, certainpov.com. Let's introduce all the players in this game as Adi Thomas. Over here. I am Fosho the Force Adept, and I've been playing around with some light side powers, but I'm starting to dab a little bit in the dark side right now.
00:43
Ben
He goes both ways.
00:43
Corey
Goes both ways.
00:45
Jmike
Bye.
00:48
Ben
My name is Ben Milton. I play the character of Phalleas Vag Killer, and I am a human Fringer. I'm sort of a human survivalist from the Outer Rim. And I'm not generally well liked by the rest of the team members, but other people seem.
01:02
Addy
That was a polite way of putting it.
01:05
Corey
Well, you know, I wouldn't miss anything, but now that you mention it, you like me.
01:09
Ben
We made a lot of money together.
01:11
Corey
We did.
01:12
Ben
That was a good time.
01:12
Jmike
You're right.
01:13
Ben
Yep.
01:13
Jmike
It wasn't a good time to fold them.
01:16
Ben
J Mike.
01:19
Jmike
Yeah, I'm J Mike. I play Stembolt. Tenure. I am a Zag Brack tech specialist. I just found out that I have special skills.
01:28
Speaker 6
Just found out.
01:29
Ben
He had page two of the characters.
01:31
Jmike
I just had special skills.
01:32
Case
Yeah. I made an offhand comment about how.
01:34
Speaker 7
I was surprised, and then he was.
01:35
Case
Like, wait, what are you talking about?
01:36
Speaker 7
And then has not stopped talking about.
01:38
Case
How, hey, did you know I have special abilities? And I'm like, that's the game. Hey, guys, doing, like, hand jokes right now.
01:52
Corey
I'm actually a Gungan soldier. I grew up on the planet of Naboo, the Dungflung Bayou. It's a little water source. The Manassas Crack. Manasse Crack Valley. Manassas Crack. You know what I'm saying? Nope. No, I don't either. So, yeah, I'm a clueless Gungan. Clueless D20 player. And who's next?
02:12
Addy
We got finally, but definitely not the least of our group, we've got Case, our dungeon master, who will guide us through the rest of our journey.
02:21
Case
Yes, indeed. Although I like to rely on a certain element of chance to guide you as well. And to that end, could I have everyone Roll me a D20, please?
02:31
Speaker 8
Oh, yeah.
02:32
Corey
Six, nine, I mean, the number nine.
02:37
Jmike
No, four.
02:41
Ben
Five.
02:43
Case
I heard a six, right?
02:44
Addy
Yeah.
02:44
Case
No, wait, I heard nine. Nine, okay.
02:46
Speaker 7
Oh, we got a. Cory,.
02:49
Speaker 8
Please tell me you were listening to the end of that episode we just played.
02:54
Corey
We were playing an episode.
02:57
Case
We are, in fact, in space.
03:01
Corey
All right, well, here goes nothing.
03:05
Speaker 8
So.
03:07
Case
We're on this.
03:08
Ben
Do you want me to pantomime this for you?
03:14
Corey
So we venture into this old spaceship, and we're protected by holy plot armor. And we're venturing through this thing, trying to find a continuum trans functioner. Close enough, batteries are dead. And standing on shoulders, climbing hallways.
03:42
Speaker 8
Wow.
03:43
Case
And then it's amazing how your recaps feel. Very much like someone trying to recall a dream where it's like, I remember this instance and this instance.
03:51
Jmike
Yeah.
03:53
Ben
And then I remember there was a flash of light.
03:55
Addy
There was a flash of light.
03:56
Ben
Somebody grabbed my ass.
03:57
Case
And then it was raining and I had to pee.
03:59
Corey
I woke up and my ass hurt. Fuck hurts. And then we found the trans function that we needed. It was human sized. It took a lot of manpower.
04:16
Case
You also found the people you were looking for first.
04:19
Corey
You did find foe, right?
04:21
Case
Yeah.
04:21
Speaker 8
Not as foe, though. Faux show. The princess were trying to rescue,.
04:31
Speaker 7
She was in this castle.
04:32
Corey
I did hit on her. I do remember that.
04:34
Speaker 8
Yes.
04:35
Ben
That explains the carrot.
04:39
Corey
Yeah. So that is my business, not yours. And then we got into this room, trying to figure out how to get out of the ship because all of us were clueless. It's really old. All the machinery is old. And then we ran into Frankenstein with shields. That's what I remember. And that was the end of the episode.
04:59
Case
That is ostensibly correct.
05:03
Ben
Frankenstein with shields, huh?
05:04
Jmike
Yep.
05:04
Corey
Frankenstein with shields. All right.
05:05
Ben
I'm game.
05:06
Corey
Yeah.
05:07
Case
This man stands there before you, and on both of his hands erupt in light. Twin light shields. You can hear Griff gasp. Even those of you who are not familiar with what his eyes have seen, the way foe has. Having peeked inside his mind, you are able to tell that this is his former master, A crumpled, broken body that has been restitched and is held aloft by the dark side of the force.
05:40
Corey
It really is a Frankenstein.
05:43
Case
He didn't imagine that.
05:46
Speaker 7
He lets out a moan and. Fuck it.
05:52
Speaker 8
It's alive. It's alive.
05:55
Case
Can I have everyone roll initiative, please?
05:59
Ben
I don't have initiative balls.
06:03
Jmike
I do have that.
06:05
Ben
I won't soon one.
06:08
Corey
Wait, is there. Do you have mine pulled up like you said you would, or no?
06:12
Addy
Yeah, I do.
06:12
Jmike
All right.
06:13
Corey
Is there like 24? Please tell me there's a plus.
06:15
Addy
I'm at 10.
06:17
Jmike
You have plus two.
06:18
Corey
Oh, great. Actually, nine.
06:19
Ben
Technically, I'm at a minus zero because.
06:22
Case
I have a minus one initially.
06:24
Speaker 8
You just sit by the side.
06:26
Speaker 7
I'm gonna sit this one out, guys.
06:28
Speaker 8
Good luck.
06:30
Ben
So winded.
06:31
Speaker 7
Sorry.
06:32
Case
Who fool was yours?
06:33
Corey
Mine was a nine.
06:33
Speaker 6
Nine. Okay,.
06:38
Speaker 7
So.
06:41
Case
The revenant, this stitched together.
06:45
Speaker 7
Sort of,.
06:48
Case
Yeah, like modern Promethean,.
06:53
Jmike
Slowly.
06:53
Case
Lunges forward towards Stimbolt. His body, it doesn't look like he's seeing things. It looks like a marionette being dangled in this very unnatural kind of posing. But he raises up his shield hand, or his right hand. He swings at you, but you're able to back away and just barely avoid the rush of this energy shield going along your chest.
07:23
Jmike
Oh, good, I didn't stab you.
07:25
Case
His progress foe in your mind, you hear the voice of Klebold.
07:33
Speaker 9
The one called Grift shall die. He must die.
07:39
Speaker 8
Oh.
07:41
Speaker 9
So you understand.
07:48
Addy
I understand.
07:50
Corey
What do you understand?
07:57
Case
Griffin lunges at what really can't be called a man anymore. His blade rises up and slams down. But the shield in his left hand, unnaturally fast moves into position to catch the blade. You hear Griff go, how?
08:22
Speaker 10
How?
08:24
Case
But the creature gives no response. Just a little guttural. What did he call me?
08:34
Ben
I think he's gassy.
08:35
Case
Fo show it is your turn.
08:39
Addy
I'm gonna immediately go for a force push.
08:43
Speaker 10
And.
08:45
Addy
Yeah, and push.
08:48
Case
Push him over.
08:49
Addy
Like, can I. Well, are we at the top of a platform? Like, can I push him off the edge?
08:55
Case
No, there's no space, there's no gap. Like, you're on a level of the ship, but there's no easy drop off near you.
09:04
Addy
Okay, well, I'm just gonna force push him away from us so we can just create a little bit of distance so we can start taking shots at him.
09:13
Speaker 6
Okay.
09:17
Speaker 8
And you're too blame. You give the light side a bad name. 15,.
09:27
Case
You successfully push both this gangly humanoid as well as Griff. You push them both over. Griffin catches himself. He stumbles a little bit, but is able to stay aloft. But he's been pushed now a few feet over. The creature falls to the ground, but then very unnaturally rises up, arching his back, standing on his four legs. Oh, that's where I draw the line.
10:07
Speaker 8
That's too freaky for me, guys.
10:09
Ben
Check.
10:10
Case
Rotates around and then stands up, facing away from you guys. Who flung dung? It is your turn.
10:16
Corey
We're gonna blast this thing up. I got two blasters still, right?
10:21
Speaker 9
Sure.
10:22
Jmike
All right.
10:22
Corey
Let's roll it.
10:24
Case
Roly poly, you gotta ask yourself one question.
10:26
Corey
Do you feel lucky?
10:29
Jmike
Do you?
10:30
Case
Oh, shh.
10:31
Ben
I'm sorry, Mr. Frankenstein.
10:33
Corey
13 And 11.
10:36
Case
Both shots are easily deflected by his shields. But again, he's not looking at you guys. It's just like he sort of has this weird. His arm goes behind his back and blocks the two shots.
10:47
Corey
Oh. Misa thinks we in trouble.
10:51
Ben
I need to see him when he's trying.
10:53
Corey
Oh, you know what I mean.
10:55
Ben
I know what you mean.
10:56
Case
Finn braces. He clearly understands what's going on here and. Does not shoot himself in the foot. He is so scared, he tries to get his hunting rifle up and to fire off a shot, but he pulls the trigger as he's pulling it into position and fires at the ground, right at his foot, but misses himself because he rolled a one and then did not confirm the criticism.
11:30
Corey
I feel your pain.
11:34
Case
Fo shou in your head. You hear your friends.
11:44
Speaker 9
You must make this look good. One must die. You must convince the people that you come in peace, that you sacrificed to be here, that you must be their savior. You must return, Lady Lian. But show that you have suffered in your path, her shall it be.
12:12
Jmike
Dammit.
12:12
Corey
Wait, what are you talking about?
12:14
Case
As that voice rings through your head. A series of droids that appear to be just decommissioned, like they're ancient. Rusty pieces of junk that were just in the room seem to come online. The lights of their systems turn on and they rise up. Now, these, again, are pieces of junk. They're ancient. And you can hear this grinding sound as their joints move and they lumber so slowly towards the group. But you are surrounded by about 20 of them. Them, they're moving uncomfortably slowly because the metal is just not giving them any give. But they're coming for you.
13:02
Speaker 6
Power pouches.
13:03
Speaker 10
What are you doing?
13:03
Ben
To come for you, old droid?
13:07
Speaker 8
Old droid.
13:10
Case
Failures.
13:11
Speaker 6
You're up.
13:12
Speaker 10
Hey.
13:13
Ben
Things are happening.
13:15
Corey
All right.
13:17
Ben
How far am I away from the Revenant?
13:21
Case
He's been pushed away from you, so about 20ft.
13:23
Ben
Okay, and how far is Griff?
13:28
Case
About 10ish. Somewhere in that range. Okay,.
13:36
Ben
I'm going to use my vibro blades and attack the Revenant.
13:44
Speaker 8
Okay.
13:44
Case
Yeah, you can. You can make it. Okay, so yeah, you can run at him. You probably wouldn't be able to get like a second attack off because you're like, rush at him.
13:54
Ben
I'll do one.
13:56
Corey
Or not.
13:59
Speaker 8
Eleven.
14:01
Case
That is a miss. You're you. You swing at him and he repositions his body so that Your blade passes between his. His arm and his torso. And he turns around now, looking at you. And it's like this uncomfortably smooth shift of his posture matching your swing.
14:25
Ben
I think I made him mad, guys.
14:29
Case
No, no.
14:32
Ben
He's just staring at me.
14:36
Case
He actually. His turn. So he swings his shield at you. What is your defense?
14:47
Ben
It's 14.
14:52
Case
So you take 10 points of vitality damage.
14:57
Speaker 8
Good Lord.
14:58
Corey
Okay.
14:59
Case
And the shield pulses off your body. You are knocked five feet back onto the floor. You are stunned for the round.
15:09
Speaker 9
Let the bodies hit the floor.
15:10
Ben
Let the bodies hit the floor.
15:12
Speaker 7
Man down.
15:14
Addy
Man down.
15:16
Speaker 8
Save yourself.
15:18
Case
Stimbolt, you're up.
15:24
Jmike
Is there a way to hack the droids? Slowly but surely.
15:27
Corey
Hack them with your knife.
15:30
Jmike
Slowly but surely lumbering toward us?
15:32
Case
Yeah, you could try to move towards one of them.
15:34
Jmike
Cool. So cool. We can put them between us and the Revenant. That probably be a good thing. That'd be computer use or repair.
15:49
Case
Like repair.
15:55
Jmike
14.
15:58
Speaker 6
Okay.
15:59
Speaker 9
You.
15:59
Case
You rush over to one, and it starts to try to grab you when you get near it, but it's. It's really jerky. Arm motions, like, start to come up, but. And it isn't able to even, like, start to grip at you. When you are able, you. You do not do a good enough. Well, I shouldn't say good enough, but a fast enough job. You're able to deactivate it, and you might be able to reprogram it next, but for the moment, you just deactivated that one.
16:26
Speaker 6
Okay,.
16:29
Addy
19 More to go.
16:30
Speaker 8
Yay. Nice job, Silicon Valley.
16:36
Jmike
I'm working on it.
16:37
Speaker 8
Okay. Here you are. Thank you. Come again. Thank you. Tex Apart. Did you reboot it? Rebooted it?
16:47
Speaker 9
Clebo.
16:48
Case
Michael's voice rings in Fauchot's ears.
16:52
Speaker 9
This run.
16:54
Case
This run.
16:55
Speaker 9
Carl Stimboat. Is he the one? Is he the one?
17:03
Speaker 6
And.
17:09
Case
We flashback to the Cosmopolitan Swift.
17:14
Speaker 7
Over.
17:16
Speaker 8
Sorry, my bad.
17:21
Case
We flash back to the Cosmopolitan Swift. Over the loudspeaker, the voice of findir pickup can be heard.
17:29
Speaker 10
We're making great time. Well, okay. Time. We're making the right amount of time. Flying at just the right speed. Not too fast, not too slow. When you ride a thunder pickup, you just go now. Where are my forced damn cigarettes?
17:47
Case
You guys are all relaxing. And Slippery Jim walks past you all in your.
17:54
Speaker 7
As you're traveling, you seguise settle in. We'll be at the Alderaan, whatever you call it. The remnants of Alderaan.
18:03
Speaker 6
I don't know.
18:04
Speaker 7
The graveyard of Alderaan. What used to be Alderaan we'll be there lickety split. You guys. You guys, just relax.
18:13
Case
We'll be there soon.
18:16
Speaker 7
Fosho.
18:17
Case
You were reflecting on a time where you were traveling. Hoof has wandered off to sort of explore the ship, as has Phelias. But you're sitting there with Stembalt.
18:31
Corey
How you doing?
18:33
Speaker 8
Hello, Stimbolt.
18:35
Corey
Whatcha doing?
18:37
Speaker 8
Have you looked at your manual and gotten to the second page of your abilities?
18:41
Jmike
I've learned so much. You wouldn't believe the things I saw. The things I've seen,.
18:48
Corey
I seen't it.
18:51
Speaker 7
You can hear Slippery Jim. Who hasn't gotten that far? It's like, oh, I bet for a tech guy from Cloud City, I'm sure you've seen plenty of shit. Mostly drunks.
19:04
Case
Also some minors, also called drunks.
19:08
Speaker 7
You've seen so much, right?
19:09
Jmike
So much. So much.
19:10
Addy
So, whatever brought you to Cloud City?
19:13
Corey
My sense of adventure sounds so adventurous.
19:16
Speaker 6
Adventure.
19:17
Speaker 7
Yeah.
19:17
Corey
Okay,.
19:19
Speaker 7
All right.
19:20
Ben
Sense of adventure.
19:22
Jmike
Oh, my God.
19:24
Speaker 7
You know what? I'm gonna make you actually roll for this one because.
19:29
Jmike
Diplomacy.
19:30
Corey
The balloon.
19:33
Speaker 7
No, this would be a bluff.
19:35
Ben
Oh, you're.
19:35
Jmike
Oh, no, wait.
19:41
Case
Now you got it.
19:42
Jmike
23.
19:47
Speaker 7
I guess your story is good enough for Slippery Gym. For show.
19:52
Case
Do a sense motive check.
19:54
Corey
Do you sense his motives?
19:59
Addy
24.
20:00
Case
Oh, you actually see through this.
20:03
Speaker 7
You find his shit not convincing at.
20:06
Case
All and you want to press on further.
20:09
Addy
So there are not a lot of Zabraks around the galaxy just running around all over the place right now. There are only a couple of them here and there. How do you. Obviously your sense of adventure seems to have led you to Cloud City of all places. But how have you been able to survive as a Zabrak in this. In this galaxy?
20:32
Jmike
You know, it's been rough. You know, a couple of us got caught up in the Sith rebellion. My cousin's cousin was this guy named. What was his name, that guy? Darth Maul. Yeah, and it kind of made things a little rough for us out here.
20:54
Speaker 8
Wait, your cousin's cousin?
20:57
Jmike
Yeah.
20:57
Ben
Isn't that your cousin?
20:59
Speaker 7
What does that make you?
21:02
Ben
His cousin?
21:03
Jmike
Cousin's cousin's cousin. Cousin's cousin.
21:06
Addy
Is he your actual cousin or is like your cousin? You're like your cousin.
21:12
Jmike
I find that offensive, sir.
21:20
Speaker 7
Oh, you horny bastard.
21:21
Speaker 6
Come on.
21:22
Speaker 7
Now, you could tell us a little about the truth. We all know the humans have become kind of mean to all of us.
21:27
Case
You know, those of us who are.
21:29
Speaker 7
Not short tongued and weak, I think is the term.
21:35
Case
Used to see that.
21:36
Jmike
Yeah, yeah, a lot of it from that one guy that you guys hang out with.
21:43
Speaker 7
Yeah, the short tongue bitch.
21:44
Jmike
He's always calling me names and pushing me around and stuff. How do you guys deal with that guy?
21:52
Addy
We tolerate him. Oh, my God.
21:54
Speaker 7
Some of us do more than tolerate.
21:55
Case
And Slippery Jim like shoves Fosho and this sort of like play. Kind of like being like, yeah, I.
22:02
Speaker 7
Know what you about. Yeah,.
22:05
Speaker 8
Not.
22:05
Addy
Not so much anymore. I kind of got tired of chasing.
22:08
Jmike
Need that.
22:08
Addy
That short tongue.
22:11
Speaker 7
I don't understand why you'd ever chase any short tongue when you could have a gun tongue.
22:24
Speaker 8
Guys, wait. This is after they.
22:30
Jmike
You guys. You guys.
22:31
Speaker 8
Okay, I forgot about that.
22:36
Speaker 10
Flashback.
22:37
Speaker 8
I thought we never were going to talk about this.
22:40
Speaker 7
It was more. He had like.
22:49
Jmike
His.
22:49
Speaker 7
His eyes kind of bounce up and down for a second before squinting hard,.
22:52
Case
Remembering, remembering that night.
22:59
Speaker 7
Oh yeah.
23:00
Ben
Opposite directions.
23:07
Speaker 7
You make a. You used to make a good point. Slippery team was just trying to have some play fun. But you certainly have your dirt.
23:14
Speaker 8
And.
23:17
Speaker 7
You horny bastard, you. You should forget any of these conversations that are occurring.
23:23
Jmike
What conversation exactly?
23:26
Speaker 7
Like, make notes on your character sheet. Don't observe anything.
23:29
Case
Or better yet, just put it on.
23:30
Speaker 7
Page two where you'll never.
23:35
Speaker 8
Well played there.
23:37
Speaker 7
Nothing like Slippery Jim to make a little bit of a metatextual joke. Has had a little bit of a Cajun thing going for a while.
23:50
Case
So we cut back to the fight.
23:52
Ben
Meanwhile, at the hall of Justice,.
23:57
Speaker 6
Griff.
23:57
Case
Steadies himself and readies his blade.
24:01
Jmike
He.
24:01
Case
He swings at his former mentor and the blade avoids the shield and actually cuts into the body where it becomes wedged in there for a moment. And the being does not flinch. He does not respond. Jim tries to cut in deeper, but nothing, no success until it finally pulls it out. And the creature just has this sort of like viscous fluid sort of seep out, but there's no pressure to it. It's not like a blood vein or any blood vessel being severed. It's just the natural oozes of inside the body just leaking out a little bit. Fo sho. You are up.
24:50
Addy
I'm actually gonna enhance ability for someone.
24:54
Jmike
Okay.
24:56
Addy
To speed them up a little bit. I'm gonna actually help Stimbolt so that he can get to work on the.
25:03
Case
On the droids 13 with that roll. Stimbolt, basically what he's doing is he's actually. He's making you work a little bit faster. So we'll say from now on, while you're working on the droids, you have advantage.
25:16
Jmike
Oh, cool.
25:18
Case
So when it is your turn, you can roll twice for any of your repair checks.
25:26
Jmike
Aw, like I'm about to die here.
25:32
Ben
Okay.
25:33
Case
Do you want to do anything else? Like you can try to sort of reposition yourself or something?
25:38
Addy
Yeah, I'm just going to move closer to the monster so that and just draw my weapon to have it ready for the next to draw my staff and have it.
25:51
Case
Do you have the sword out or you're just holding the staff?
25:54
Addy
So I'm just going with the staff.
25:55
Case
Is the sword visible or have you sort of like concealed it in your robes?
25:58
Jmike
Okay.
25:59
Case
All right, Hoof, you're up.
26:02
Corey
I'm gonna try to shoot it again.
26:04
Case
Okay, you're going for the Revenant.
26:06
Jmike
Yeah.
26:06
Case
Okay, go for it.
26:09
Speaker 10
Yes.
26:11
Jmike
No.
26:14
Corey
26. 13.
26:16
Case
The 26 hits.
26:20
Speaker 10
11.
26:22
Case
You blast into the revenant. His body shudders. You can see this shockwave of where the blast hit. He doesn't recoil though. And the skin where you shot him is like seared. But he continues to stand there, like, sort of lumbering about in this combat with Phelias and with Grif.
26:50
Corey
Did you guys just see that?
26:52
Speaker 6
Nope.
26:54
Corey
Didn't even phase him.
26:56
Ben
Were phasers on stun?
26:57
Corey
Oh, whoops.
27:00
Ben
Wrong game.
27:03
Case
Finn tries to fire off a shot. He shoots at the revenant, but the revenant actually deflects it and bounces it back at Griff with his shield. And Griff takes the hit, taking 10 points of vitality damage. You see him recoil. He's was not pleasant for him. We can say.
27:34
Speaker 8
Griff is still kind.
27:35
Addy
Of exhausted from catching Hoof earlier.
27:37
Case
Yeah, right. He's certainly hurting. The droids continue to move towards you, except for the one that's been disabled by Stimbolt. It's going to take a little while before that. They're like right on top of you, but they're lumbering slowly towards you. Phelous, you are up.
27:56
Ben
All right, guys, we need to get out of here. Forget trying to kill that thing. Let's run like hell. Is there like a doorway out of here?
28:07
Speaker 6
Yes.
28:08
Ben
Okay, is there anything between us and that doorway?
28:11
Case
You see a speeder? It's a very old fashioned one. You think you could probably jury rig it to get it going?
28:20
Jmike
It.
28:20
Case
It's seems like it's basically an engine with like a carrying vessel on it, but you don't see any like, damage on it. It probably is just in mostly working condition that like you could. You're pretty good with. With getting those kind of things up and running.
28:38
Speaker 8
Okay.
28:39
Ben
Let's go for that.
28:40
Jmike
All right.
28:40
Case
So you make a movement towards that.
28:41
Ben
You need a repair check?
28:42
Case
Yes, please.
28:46
Corey
Oh, nice.
28:46
Ben
I rolled a 1 16.
28:50
Jmike
Okay.
28:50
Case
With a 16, you're starting to get it going. You flip some switches, and you start sort of messing with the engine as a whole. It starts to putter and then dies. But you hit it.
29:05
Addy
Yes.
29:06
Corey
American components, Russian components, all made in Taiwan.
29:09
Case
It revs a little bit. It's not ready to go, but it's good. But with a little bit of more work, you will have it actually in, like, flying shape.
29:17
Speaker 7
Okay.
29:20
Ben
Go team. Let's not die.
29:22
Case
The voice of Klebold rips through you. You hear?
29:26
Speaker 9
What about human? The one you call Faireous Vag killer. What about him? You have a heart towards him. What about that one?
29:46
Case
And we flash back to Yavin 4, where Huflungdong and Fo Shou are disembarking from a fighter. They're hauling off their bags. The base has already been settled, but it's still very much in its early phase. You're sort of taking it all in. You haven't seen it before, and you're hauling your gear off.
30:22
Corey
What a night, huh?
30:24
Addy
Right?
30:24
Corey
Can you believe he cockswallow did that?
30:27
Addy
Seriously. Such a jerk. You know what I like to do after fighter missions like this? Should go play volleyball with the other guys.
30:35
Jmike
Yeah.
30:35
Corey
Who wears shorts?
30:37
Case
We wear shorts, as you sort of joke to hide your pain and suffering. In the distance, you see a group of soldiers coming back. They clearly were on a hunting mission. Faucho. In this, like, the golden time of this. This beautiful sunset, you lay eyes on this human Adonis, who is dragging a woolamander while carrying a hunting rifle. And this is the first time your eyes. You lay eyes on Phelius Vagkiller.
31:19
Speaker 8
Look at the size of that thing. That's a huge beast.
31:27
Case
The humans are moving past you now. Thalias. These two have not been at the base yet. Like, this is their first time arriving there. And it's. You know, there's mostly been humans here. You were not with their unit beforehand, so it's your first time sort of seeing them, encountering them. But you walk past them, hauling your. Your kill, ready to actually eat some meat instead of just, like, processed food rations.
32:02
Ben
All right?
32:03
Jmike
No. All right.
32:05
Ben
You guys aren't hungry? All right, fine. Cook it up later.
32:09
Speaker 6
Foe.
32:09
Case
This is your first time seeing this man. Do you want to say hi, introduce yourself?
32:13
Addy
No, I'm too shy.
32:15
Speaker 8
Too shy? Shy? He's too beautiful.
32:21
Case
Feliz Can I get a spot check?
32:22
Corey
Spot check?
32:26
Case
Just failures. Failures.
32:27
Corey
I spot.
32:32
Jmike
Hold on.
32:32
Ben
I gotta zoom that in because my.
32:33
Case
Eyes aren't as good as they used to be.
32:37
Corey
Gotta stop playing with yourself.
32:42
Ben
30.
32:44
Case
You notice that this. This Keldor is kind of taken aback by you. Like, you give me a sense motive check.
32:57
Speaker 10
Two.
32:59
Speaker 7
Okay.
33:00
Case
You think that it's because he really fucking hates you?
33:04
Ben
That makes sense. Now it all makes sense, dude. All right, douchebag.
33:08
Case
Do you say anything? Do you confront him about it? Like, just. This guy just, like, is just giving you, like, the stink eye.
33:15
Ben
Yeah. You all right?
33:18
Jmike
No. You're here.
33:21
Case
That's racist.
33:21
Jmike
What?
33:23
Addy
I should have thought this through.
33:27
Jmike
Hi.
33:28
Speaker 7
Okay, Hoof, give me a essence motive check as well.
33:35
Corey
Is there a plus to this or no?
33:38
Speaker 7
For you, probably not.
33:40
Speaker 8
It's two.
33:42
Corey
That's what I'm talking about.
33:43
Ben
This is gonna be awesome.
33:44
Jmike
Awesome.
33:45
Corey
5.
33:48
Case
You are reading the situation real weird. You think, like, you think that Phalleas.
33:53
Speaker 7
Really wants to fuck foe, and foe.
33:56
Case
Is, like, giving off, like, please don't vibes, and you want to defend your friend.
34:02
Corey
Why you looking at him like that, bro?
34:05
Ben
What?
34:06
Corey
You better put the chub away.
34:08
Speaker 8
What are you talking about? That was direct.
34:13
Ben
Are you.
34:14
Speaker 8
What the hell is wrong?
34:15
Corey
Why is it looking at you like that?
34:17
Ben
What the fuck is wrong with you two?
34:22
Addy
I think we got stuff to do.
34:23
Ben
Yeah, why don't you go do it?
34:27
Speaker 6
Okay.
34:27
Corey
He was in front of me, bro.
34:29
Ben
Yeah, I guess I am.
34:31
Case
You guys just continue grabbing your bags and make your way into the temple to sort of find your quarters.
34:38
Ben
What the hell?
34:40
Corey
I can't believe he looked at you like that. Like that. He literally looked like he wanted to rape you.
34:47
Speaker 8
You wanted that?
34:49
Case
Oh, I didn't say that.
34:50
Corey
I totally misread that.
34:55
Case
The revenant brings his shields together and bringing the two force fields in alignment with each other lets off a pulse. Everyone, can I get a reflex save, please?
35:04
Speaker 8
Reflexive.
35:05
Ben
Reflexive. 18.
35:08
Corey
What's my reflex? Please say it's a plus, not a minus.
35:11
Case
5.
35:13
Speaker 9
7.
35:15
Speaker 8
7.
35:20
Corey
I rolled a 2.
35:22
Speaker 6
All right.
35:23
Speaker 7
Anyone who beat a 10 is still standing close.
35:29
Case
Except, well, Fous, you were already knocked down.
35:32
Ben
No, I was fixing the thing.
35:33
Speaker 6
Oh,.
35:36
Case
You were stunned before. Okay, well, whatever.
35:38
Speaker 6
You're.
35:39
Case
You're still standing now.
35:40
Speaker 7
It's good.
35:41
Case
I'm still standing.
35:43
Speaker 8
Yeah, yeah.
35:44
Case
You two have been knocked over by.
35:47
Speaker 7
By the.
35:47
Case
This, like, shock wave being emitted by. The revenant. Spins his torso around and slashes at Griff, but Griff is able to deflect it. With his shield. Stembolt, it's your turn.
36:17
Jmike
All right, cool. I'm gonna continue to work on these droids as I roll another repair.
36:21
Speaker 6
Yep.
36:21
Jmike
And with the one.
36:23
Case
So roll it twice and take the better of the two results.
36:31
Jmike
Yeah. 27.
36:32
Speaker 7
Okay.
36:33
Speaker 6
Yeah.
36:33
Case
That droid that you were working on is now working for you.
36:38
Jmike
Yay.
36:40
Case
So you are able to send it on a very rudimentary command. What do you send it?
36:49
Jmike
Play defense for Griff.
36:50
Ben
Defense.
36:51
Speaker 7
Okay.
36:52
Case
It begins very slowly, lumbering toward Griff.
37:03
Jmike
Can I start working on another one, too? Or I have to wait till next time?
37:06
Case
That was your turn for this one. Yeah. But it's now moving towards Griff. Imagine C3PO, but even jerkier, slower, and every single motion creates the sound of, like, fingers on a chalkboard.
37:19
Speaker 8
So painful.
37:20
Speaker 7
Yeah.
37:21
Case
And that's all of them. Like, that's the noise that you guys are hearing right now. This is just so terrible for all of you. So Griff is. Was just able to protect himself from the attack. His shield is locked below, blocking the. The shield of his former mentor. But he. He tries to fire off a shot from his gun, and it successfully hits the revenant roughly where he already stabbed into it. But as with Hoof's shots, the skin burns, and there's, like, little bits of hussing and blisters, but there's no recognition of pain. The body is starting to get torn up a little bit, but there's. It doesn't seem to be actually stopping the motion of this thing.
38:17
Corey
Somebody needs to shoot this thing in the head.
38:20
Ben
It's my turn.
38:21
Case
It is foe's turn. And then yours.
38:23
Speaker 8
Actually, sort of what I was gonna go for, because I wanted to go.
38:26
Addy
Take my staff and just jab at his head.
38:30
Case
Okay. So give it an attack roll.
38:37
Speaker 10
Yay.
38:38
Speaker 8
18.
38:40
Case
All right, that's a hit. Roll for damage.
38:43
Addy
Six.
38:44
Speaker 7
Okay.
38:45
Speaker 6
That.
38:45
Case
You hit it really hard.
38:47
Speaker 10
So you.
38:47
Case
You're aiming for the head.
38:48
Speaker 9
Yep.
38:49
Case
You smash into the head, and it. There's like, a creepy softness to how the. The stick, like. Or stick your staff kind of goes into the flesh. Like, it's almost like the bones inside there were already kind of broken up and being held together by something maybe a little bit deeper in. It's, like, kind of like slapping jello. But the revenant doesn't fall.
39:25
Corey
Hoof.
39:28
Case
Hoof, lung, dung. It is your turn.
39:32
Corey
So he's got a staff in his head or.
39:35
Case
It's not in his head. He, like, smacked him like, a staff infection.
39:40
Corey
Well, I'm gonna shoot him in the head again.
39:42
Ben
It's good.
39:43
Speaker 6
Okay.
39:44
Case
You know, look at that joke.
39:45
Jmike
Yeah.
39:46
Speaker 9
Gosh darn it, he's dice it, I swear.
39:48
Ben
You want to switch?
39:49
Jmike
Yeah. All right.
39:52
Corey
18 And 13.
39:57
Jmike
Okay.
39:58
Case
The 18 hits.
39:58
Ben
Boom Shaka laka.
40:05
Corey
14. Please tell me his head comes off.
40:08
Case
All right, the head doesn't come off, but the side of the head that you hit it on does sort of like blow apart and there's this like flowing down ooze. It's a little bit denser than you.
40:18
Speaker 7
Would expect.
40:21
Case
That there's sort of like a Hindi kind of texture to his fluids, which is really weird. It's also he hasn't dropped, which is another part that's really fucked up. Clearly his head is now very damaged.
40:37
Speaker 7
On both sides.
40:40
Case
And he's still standing there. And the voice of Klebold ripples through Fauchot.
40:51
Speaker 9
Well, what about this one? Your friend of your car.
40:58
Case
Hoof lang diang.
41:02
Speaker 9
How about Hammond?
41:04
Speaker 8
No, not him. He's my best friend. Boy Blue.
41:09
Case
The voice of Commander Codswallow rings out over the loudspeakers of the ship.
41:15
Speaker 6
All personnel, all personnel, we need everyone to the flight deck. All personnel to the flight deck.
41:21
Corey
There goes Cock swallow again. Being a cock who swallows.
41:25
Case
You two are in flight suits, running towards the deck. Alarms are going off, soldiers are running. Everyone, everyone's trying to get there.
41:35
Speaker 6
We are. We are evacuating Dantooine. We are evacuating Dantooine. All. All pilots. All pilots. You will be defending our. Our fleet as they escape. We must make sure to lead the Empire away. They cannot find our base while we are still evacuating. You must lead them away.
41:56
Corey
Good thing I'm not a pilot.
41:58
Speaker 6
I'm sorry. This is not. This is a dire mission. But we must protect the fleet. We must protect the rebellion. To that end, everyone must mount up into their ships and engage the Empire. This is. This is a losing battle. But it is one that if we cause just enough of a delay, we might still win this war.
42:21
Case
And you guys are getting ready inside a two man fighter, an R2 1A wing interceptor. But it's kind of a fucked up one. All of these are sort of like either aftermarket, sort of retrofitted for combat, or are damaged ones. In some cases they're actually like the older school model ones in the Clone wars that are being updated just to be able to exist in flight. And as a result, a lot of the systems have been jury rigged or are extremely old. Not everyone has a fully functional R2 unit and so all of them have been set up to use the instructor modes so that there can be two people piloting it. One person controlling the more tactical piloting, the other person controlling acceleration and navigational components. So you guys are loading up.
43:16
Corey
Well, it's nice knowing you, buddy.
43:18
Speaker 8
But I'm still sticking with you for this.
43:19
Jmike
Yeah.
43:20
Case
You guys are in the ship together.
43:22
Corey
This is a death mission, isn't it?
43:24
Addy
We're gonna get out of this one alive.
43:26
Corey
All right, well, how's the system? Systems go.
43:28
Addy
Yeah, let's. Let's go. You got acceleration.
43:30
Corey
Acceleration's on navigations. How's our RTD2? Is it functional?
43:34
Addy
I don't think we can afford.
43:35
Case
It is barely an R2 unit at all. It's like, just the most basic of astromech functions going on.
43:41
Corey
All right, we have an R1.
43:42
Jmike
And a half.
43:45
Speaker 8
I'm not even sure about that half.
43:47
Speaker 7
Can I have both of you give.
43:48
Case
Me pilot checks, please?
43:49
Corey
I didn't even know it was a pilot.
43:51
Speaker 8
Right. I didn't even try to dispute. Well, we clearly are. Good, because we have a minus. You have a minus.
43:57
Speaker 10
2.
43:59
Case
Jesus, Christmas.
44:00
Speaker 8
I do, too.
44:01
Corey
13.
44:02
Speaker 10
Oh.
44:02
Speaker 8
I have nine.
44:05
Speaker 7
You guys successfully pull out of the ship. You do, like.
44:14
Case
You do one of those takeoffs where your. Your ship, like, starts to take off. And then one of the wings dips down and scrapes along the deck and then takes off, like, finally properly, but you're, like, really wobbly coming out of. Out of the airlock. You guys fly out now. There's this whole mishmash of ships going out there. And you're. You're going with a couple capital ships, but for the most part, away from the rest of the Rebellion fleet, trying to get off of Dantooine. And you are going into the blackness of space. For a few moments there, it's just dark and silent. Think that maybe the Empire isn't coming. And then they snap into the real space. They come out of hyperspace just. Star Destroyer. Star Destroyer.
45:09
Corey
Evasive maneuvers.
45:10
Speaker 8
Evasive maneuvers.
45:11
Case
TIE fighters launching.
45:12
Jmike
Off.
45:14
Case
You guys are in the thick of things. The dog fight is upon you there.
45:19
Speaker 8
I was gonna do barrel rolls. Sir, put your mask back on.
45:26
Speaker 7
Wait, that's. A drink, guys.
45:27
Ben
That's.
45:28
Speaker 7
That is a worthy reference.
45:34
Speaker 8
Well done, sir.
45:35
Corey
Well done.
45:36
Speaker 7
That was quality.
45:41
Case
You guys are locked into this. TIE fighters are blasting at you. You see ship after ship of your allies going down, drumming like flies. Yes, indeed. You see the capital ships that were. That were with you are taking fire. And finally you get a square shot directly across your bow and all systems go dead on your craft. You are floating dead in space. And finally you see that the last capital ship go to faster than light speed and jump out. The fleet, as far as you can tell, is lost. The remaining fighters are being. And just when you think that the swarm of TIE fighters is about to turn upon you, A very close pass of a Star Destroyer obscures you from their line of sight as you float amongst the wreckage of the other ships.
46:41
Case
Finally, they finish cleaning up everything that's been destroyed or all the fleet that has been engaged with them. And they move on away from Dantooine. And you're left there to float in space. The atmosphere is stable, but you only have so much air and hoof, you only have so much of your gas. Can I get repair checks to try to get your ship running again?
47:07
Ben
I guess this is it, buddy.
47:08
Corey
Should have slept with your mom when I had a chance.
47:13
Speaker 8
I got a two and you got a plus two. All right, what the fuck? Wait, what? We might be altering the timeline. Guys,.
47:25
Corey
I am your father.
47:27
Case
You guys are working on it, but there doesn't seem to be any sort of progress. Time is starting to go. You guys are running out of atmosphere. You're getting weak. You're getting tired. Give me more repair checks please.
47:40
Corey
Oh geez.
47:41
Addy
Please repair.
47:43
Ben
Please die in space. Please die in space.
47:47
Corey
If we die in space at this moment, then.
47:56
Speaker 8
We figured out time travel. Guys, please die in space. Oh no.
48:02
Corey
That was a plus two, right?
48:04
Speaker 8
Oh yeah, you have a plus two?
48:05
Corey
18. Oh wait, do I do computer repair?
48:10
Case
Oh no, you're doing repair.
48:11
Corey
Just repair, right? Aw man.
48:13
Case
Okay, so as you guys are floating and you feel yourself getting tired and spend hours trying to get this back to work, finally you cross the right wire and a cursor shows up on your computer layout.
48:28
Ben
Would you like to play a game?
48:30
Corey
Hold on. Why does it say insert coin and.
48:33
Case
Give me a computer use check hoof.
48:36
Corey
Oh, this is before I learned how to use computers.
48:41
Speaker 8
Oh, sorry.
48:43
Addy
Six. Yeah.
48:45
Speaker 8
Twelve.
48:48
Case
With that you are able to enter a command line to restart the systems.
48:53
Corey
Hey, check this out. I think I can restart the systems.
48:55
Case
Can you hold my breath?
48:57
Speaker 8
You don't have much left.
48:59
Case
It comes back online and you guys are able to plot a course to Yavin 4, your assigned meetup spot. And you take off into faster than light speed.
49:12
Corey
Boom.
49:14
Speaker 8
Woo.
49:15
Corey
Fist bump. Wait, can we fist bump? Probably not self bump.
49:20
Addy
Are we like a back to back type scenarios?
49:23
Case
This ship or I figured each in line kind of thing. But Maybe back to back.
49:28
Speaker 7
Back to back.
49:28
Case
Was the speeders right?
49:29
Addy
Yeah.
49:30
Speaker 7
Yes. You guys are in a back to back scenario.
49:33
Corey
Back to back fist bump.
49:34
Speaker 8
Yep.
49:34
Corey
Boom.
49:37
Case
And as you fly off to yavin4 to meet ultimately, your comrades and begin this journey, the voice of Klebold speaks out to you foe.
49:50
Speaker 9
Which of your allies choose one for one must die for this to work.
49:57
Ben
Say a name.
49:58
Speaker 9
Say a name.
50:00
Speaker 8
Say a name.
50:01
Case
Say a name.
50:04
Addy
I'm not choosing any of them.
50:07
Speaker 9
You choose none.
50:10
Addy
We lose Griff today, but not any of my friends. You need my help just as much, Clebo, because I need yours.
50:22
Speaker 9
You see how this plan will not work so well. Perhaps by saving your friends today, you have doomed them forever. But very well.
50:35
Case
And the revenant twists around and with one of his shields, it goes down for a moment. And his hand touches Griff's chest and it reactivates, creating a massive gash in his chest, shattering his ribs, burning through. Shattering his ribs and burning through his flesh. And Grif falls. And Finn screams.
51:04
Speaker 8
No.
51:08
Case
With that, we end session.
51:11
Corey
Was Griffin nice one or the.
51:13
Addy
No, you.
51:15
Speaker 8
Not that it matters.
51:16
Jmike
I mean,.
51:19
Speaker 8
Finn was the nicer one. He's the one who likes us. Was like. Was. Was encouraging you when you were talking about the princess.
51:28
Speaker 9
Yes.
51:28
Corey
All right. Yes, good.
51:29
Speaker 8
Griff, not so much.
51:30
Corey
All right. Goodbye, Griffith.
51:32
Addy
Yeah, Griff is a little bit more gruff.
51:35
Speaker 8
So we'll find out what happens next to our crew of our Nerf herders.
51:38
Addy
And adventurers the next time. Next time on the Scruffy Nerf Herders, a Star Wars D20 story. Don't forget you can check out past adventures and you can check out other podcasts by going to our website, Certain Point of View or I'm sorry, certainpov.com all of our podcasts are there. Please rate, review and subscribe to them. You can choose. All of you can find them all there fun and games with Matt and Jeff. We've got another pass with our own very own Case Aiken. And of course with me and Ben and sometimes J Mike, we have Certain Point of view as well.
52:10
Speaker 8
All of that is on our website,.
52:12
Addy
Certainpov.com and until next time, stay scruffy, my nerf herders.
52:16
Speaker 9
Sweetly cpov.
52:21
Case
Certainpov.com.