Session 30 - JOURNEY INTO MIST-ERY
The Nerfherders now have an actual herder of Nerfs in their company. Now they just need to make it back to their ship... and survive a night at their new friend's home.
Scruffy Nerfherders Full Episode
Originally aired: August 2, 2018
Podcast Edited by Case Aiken
Music: Purple Planet Music
Music: www.purple-planet.com
Certain Point Of View is a podcast network brining you all sorts of nerdy goodness! From Star Wars role playing, to Disney day dreaming, to video game love, we've got the show for you! Learn more on our website: https://www.certainpov.com
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⏱️ Chapters
00:06 Welcome and Intros
02:21 Recap Roll
03:13 Stembolt Recaps the Maze
05:05 Imperial Probes Launch
06:29 Arvis Leads the Party Home
07:31 Meeting Patapan Reed
10:24 Inside the Reed House
11:47 Stembolt Meets Kleppany
13:30 Arvis Shows Off His Room
16:56 Arvis’s Collection of Doohickeys
18:21 The Power System
19:02 Arvis Dreams of Flying
21:26 The Deal for the Power Unit
22:19 Planning the Trip Back
24:20 Meeting Jessie Ray
27:39 Resting for the Night
30:14 Dinner with the Reeds
31:41 Nerf Butter
34:05 The Barter Economy
35:40 Reed Butter Branding
36:29 A Night at the Reed House
37:26 Loading the Power System
39:41 Into the Dust Cloud
41:17 The Skill Challenge Begins
43:16 Arvis Trusts the Tauntauns
44:46 Phallus Uses Survival
45:31 Stembolt Crowdsources Directions
48:12 Arvis Handles the Tauntauns
51:43 Phallus Spots the Way Forward
52:53 Gary the Nerf
53:32 Spotting the Captured Crew
54:36 House Fedor Has the Susan
55:14 Debating the Rescue
56:36 Sending the Reeds Home
57:30 Sneaking Toward the Susan
58:08 Phallus Blows Their Cover
58:48 Cliffhanger
58:51 Outro
59:38 Post-Show
Transcription
00:06
Addy
Hey, Nerf Herders. I'm Addy Thomas.
00:08
Ben
And I am Ben Milton.
00:09
Jmike
And I'm Jmike Folson.
00:10
Case Aiken
And I am Case Aiken.
00:12
Addy
Thanks for joining all of us here for another session of the Scruffy Nerf Herders, a Star Wars D20 story. We're continuing our adventures right now. We're on the planet Killia, but we'll introduce all of that and where we left off last in the story in just a minute.
00:28
Jmike
But.
00:28
Addy
But I just want to remind you can go to our website and check out a number of other podcasts, including not just the Scruffy Nerf Herders, but you can listen to Certain Point of View with me and Ben, where we talk about different topics within the Star wars universe. Then, of course, Case, our dungeon master, also has a podcast of his own, another pass, where he revisits movies and retweaks them a little bit, re pitches some ideas within them. It's a fun, creative exercise to work through. And then, of course, we've got our buddies, Matt and Jeff. Fun and games with Matt and Jeff as they talk video games. So we have lots of podcasts you can check out on our website, certainpov.com be sure to check that out again. Certainpov.com well, let's go ahead and introduce the cast of characters for this episode.
01:15
Addy
And actually, Case, I need to know, do I need to introduce two characters or one character?
01:20
Case Aiken
I think we can just introduce the latter.
01:22
Addy
Okay, got it. Let's see. So I, Addy Thomas. I play a new character to our cre, Arvis Reed. He's a nomad, and he is literally a herder of nerfs, and he's just met our group of adventurers.
01:40
Ben
All right, this is Ben, and I'm playing Phallus Vag killer. I'm a human fringer from the outer Rim. I'm a bit of a survivalist. I don't get along well with people, and I'm kind of a dick. But I'm the glue that holds it all together. Are you a little bit Dick glue? Dick glue. That's what I am. I'm dick glue. Starchy goodness, high in protein, all the goodness.
02:12
Jmike
I'm J. Mike, and I play Stembolt Noor. I am a Zach Brack tech specialist, and I'd say I'm the lovable punching.
02:19
Ben
Bag of this group, just like in real life.
02:21
Case Aiken
And I am the dungeon master for this whole thing. I love you all and I wish to guide you on this. This fun adventure. To that end, could I Have everyone roll a D20 for recap, please.
02:33
Addy
I rolled a 4.
02:35
Ben
I got a 1612 J. Mike, last.
02:40
Case Aiken
Time you made me do the entire game right.
02:42
Ben
You went into details that I had forgotten.
02:44
Case Aiken
Unfortunately, I have notes that go back because obviously I do.
02:47
Ben
There's a couple episodes where I was like, that happened.
02:49
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. Well, then I tried to gloss over some stuff and you're like, what about the shaved Wookiee?
02:56
Ben
Well, that was one of my. Honestly, that's a hype.
02:57
Case Aiken
Bring back the Wookiee.
02:58
Jmike
That's a hype.
02:59
Ben
We even made a T shirt because.
03:01
Addy
He's hoping to get that Wookiee.
03:03
Case Aiken
Still.
03:03
Jmike
No.
03:03
Case Aiken
We made a T shirt of Guppy, the Mon Calamari pimp.
03:07
Ben
It's all one big fuzzy mess for me.
03:13
Jmike
Okay, we left off last time after we spent an egregious amount of time in the maze.
03:21
Ben
It was an unbelievable, incredibly long time.
03:24
Jmike
So long. That maze. Being hunted by a giant cat demon thing.
03:30
Ben
That episode was just a little over an hour and I'm almost sure like 50 minutes of it was.
03:35
Jmike
We were so lost.
03:37
Case Aiken
That was the session.
03:38
Jmike
Like, were just so lost that entire time. But we came out with attack kittens.
03:46
Ben
That's what I forgot. Yes.
03:49
Case Aiken
And Thundercats.
03:51
Jmike
Let's name them after the Thundercats. We also, I think they sent death squads to the ship to go kill the other guys, didn't they?
04:00
Ben
Yeah. Cause we headed off that direction to try and find.
04:03
Addy
Not to kill the other guys, but to get people who wanted to help. And if other people weren't on board, then.
04:10
Jmike
You know, this sounds very familiar.
04:12
Case Aiken
We're gonna go in a different direction.
04:14
Ben
Adi's starting to justify his evil actions over here.
04:18
Case Aiken
Thank you, Fosho, for keeping this fair and balanced.
04:24
Addy
I just want to make sure we've covered all points of view here.
04:27
Jmike
Sure, sure.
04:29
Case Aiken
Crossfire.
04:32
Jmike
And then.
04:33
Ben
Are you Hannity or Combs?
04:36
Addy
It's just a certain point of view, not just, you know, sensationalist points of view.
04:43
Jmike
Yeah, and then we ran into a nerve herder, a legitimate Nerf, and I think that's where we're picking up today.
04:52
Ben
And he's a mouth breathing idiot.
04:54
Jmike
You're a Nerf. So I don't see.
04:56
Ben
Yeah, he called me. That doesn't mean it's true. I know that this is the age we live in, but just because you say it doesn't mean it's true.
05:05
Case Aiken
The asteroid field, which was once Alderaan. A damaged Corellian Corvette is floating when a tractor beam locks onto it and pulls it into A Star Destroyer surrounded by guards. The crimson guards that had been on the ship come out and they kneel before this red headed figure. Guards, report. There was a Force user amongst them.
05:31
Jmike
He was.
05:34
Case Aiken
Not as powerful as Lord Vader or the Master, but possessed dark energies and shocked us with lightning. Really? A Dark Force user? Yes, Mistress. We believe that he somehow survived the. No, that's not possible. No, wherever he came from, he had companions who were adequate fighters. They were able to get the Lieutenant Commander away. And destroyed our ship. Well, we should launch probes. If they went from here, we should figure out where they were off to. At once, Mistress. And from the Star Destroyer out into all the directions of space, Imperial probes are launched, shooting off of them, just barely avoiding the shreds of this Star Destroyer that had been destroyed before by your friends.
06:26
Jmike
Woo. Yeah.
06:29
Case Aiken
And we're going to cut Arvis Reed, that scruffy looking nerf herder, leading you guys to his house. In the distance you come upon it. It's a shack, it's sodden, and it's one of those where they dig it somewhat into the earth to sort of retain like a hobbit hole. It's not like a full on burrow into the earth, but it's dug down. So it's like the room that we're actually in real life, which is like we're down about five feet from ground level. If you stood up, you'd be above the ground. It's not.
07:02
Addy
So it's nice and cool.
07:03
Case Aiken
Yeah, so it stays cool. And then they take the dirt that they dug out and make into sodden bricks to actually assemble the house from around it. But it's cozy. It looks like it's been in the family for a long time. And because it's just dirt, you've been able to expand it out and so it's got some nice features to it. It looks like it's more than just like a little ditch for y' all to like sit around and eat and fuck in.
07:26
Ben
Although I have a feeling before the night's over,.
07:31
Case Aiken
What wood you have is used to make fences and things like that. So there's stables for tauntauns that you would be able to use to ride out. There's additional pins for nerfs because you have areas where you can bring them in if you need to watch them for the night or something like that. While you all take shifts actually looking after your flock. There's clearly fires in the cooking area ready to go. And you see your, your Father Patapan coming in. He's. He's hauling like a little bit of wood that he like chopped down off in the distance. Anyways. Hi, son.
08:09
Addy
Hey, Pa.
08:12
Case Aiken
What you got there? Don't you now.
08:16
Addy
We got. I got some. Some strangers. They. They seem to be in need and they got these kitties with them too.
08:22
Case Aiken
Kitties?
08:24
Addy
Yeah. Kitties.
08:25
Ben
What.
08:25
Addy
Where'd you. Kitties.
08:27
Ben
Nobody's eating my pussy.
08:30
Case Aiken
God dang it. How are you pushy? If I want to.
08:33
Ben
Don't you know that's where I draw the line, sir. That is where I draw the line. I will not have my pussy eaten in this episode. I just got this pussy.
08:47
Case Aiken
What kind of way did you get that pussy that you care so much about it instead of getting eaten?
08:53
Ben
I found it in a. Found it in the bush.
08:57
Jmike
Yeah.
08:57
Case Aiken
That's where you find them.
08:59
Ben
Yep.
09:00
Case Aiken
Except the good ones. The good ones are out in the open.
09:03
Ben
Yeah, they are nice and clean. Well, Johnny, this is a bush.
09:09
Case Aiken
Now what's up with your friend had the horns?
09:13
Ben
He's. He's from a planet. A different planet. And he's called a Zone. He's called a Zabrak. His name is Stimbolt.
09:21
Case Aiken
What's a Stimbolt?
09:22
Ben
That's an excellent question. What is a Stimul?
09:24
Jmike
I have no idea.
09:26
Addy
I've been wondering that myself.
09:29
Case Aiken
Is that some sort of thing the kids are doing these days?
09:33
Addy
I choose not to ask about that. Those. Those things, they confuse me.
09:39
Case Aiken
Well, if you love House tried them. I guess it's alright. We got plenty of food even if they won't let us eat the plushies.
09:47
Jmike
But.
09:48
Case Aiken
So why don't you lead them on in. Let them see your sister and your other sister.
09:53
Addy
As long as you keep your. Your Nerf fucking activities outside the house.
09:57
Ben
Never fucked a Nerf.
09:58
Case Aiken
Sir.
09:59
Ben
Sir.
10:00
Jmike
Your.
10:01
Addy
Your words say no, but your. Your eyes, they definitely tell a story.
10:07
Case Aiken
Yeah, they do. You. You son. You got a good idea for these boys.
10:14
Ben
All right, well, let's just.
10:15
Case Aiken
Well, get out, ain't there.
10:16
Ben
Let's go on in and get this over with.
10:20
Jmike
Keeping my kitty safe away from you guys.
10:24
Case Aiken
You walk in there and working in the. The kitchen area. You find your sister Arvis. You find Klippani. And you also see your brother De Poil. And they're just sort of readying food. Notably it seems to be like vermin that's been like caught out. Like I think more like catching rabbits out in the wild. So it's not big game. But like they. They've caught it. Probably in some sort of, like, traps, and they're skinning it, and they're just doing it all in the room there. So there's, like, hair all over the place, and it's. It's kind of gross. Like, the concept of cleanliness isn't really on, like, the top of the priority list here. Well, hey, brother. How you doing?
10:57
Addy
Hey, Clippy. Good. Just brought in the.
11:02
Jmike
The.
11:03
Addy
The flocks. And these. These two strangers. Watch out for this one. But then there's this horny bastard. He seems like a nice feller.
11:12
Case Aiken
That horny bastard does seem pretty good, don't you know? Says your brother, De Poil.
11:18
Addy
Hey, De Poil.
11:21
Case Aiken
Hi, brother. How goes out the days in the flocks?
11:26
Addy
Days a bit hot. Just decided to take a nap out there and kind of lost track of time, but. But now. Now I'm back with the. These strangers.
11:33
Case Aiken
Well. Like you do. Well, it's good to have you back. It's good to have people here, but thank you, sir. That's good claping. Well, yeah. Boys, it's so good to have you all here.
11:47
Ben
J. Mike, this is all you, is it? This is. This. This episode is all about you, buddy. I'm stepping back and letting you drive.
11:53
Case Aiken
The car, for you are like a horn of bastards, I see.
11:58
Jmike
Thank you, ma'. Am.
11:59
Case Aiken
Yeah, you should be.
12:02
Jmike
Oh, no.
12:03
Ben
Oh, yeah.
12:05
Case Aiken
Give me a spot check.
12:09
Jmike
Oh, yeah.
12:10
Ben
Oh, yeah.
12:15
Jmike
16.
12:19
Case Aiken
She looks like her family tree has not forked very much.
12:24
Jmike
Oh, no.
12:25
Ben
Oh, she's probably forked a lot.
12:27
Case Aiken
Oh, she has, yes. Just to keep the bloodline aggressively pure in this axe.
12:33
Addy
Be careful what you say. And that spot check.
12:38
Ben
But meanwhile, and so this isn't done in a good Targaryen way, is she more. Is she more Dany, or is she more Brienne?
12:48
Case Aiken
I would say more Brienne.
12:49
Ben
Okay, good.
12:51
Case Aiken
Now, also, Stumbalt, could you give me a sense motive?
12:54
Jmike
Check. Oh, God. Oh, no. 10.
13:02
Case Aiken
Yeah. So definitely more of a. Yeah. Of. More of a Brienne. And you're not quite clear what the vibe you're getting off her is. Is she a good person? Is she a predator? Is she prey? You can't really tell.
13:17
Jmike
Okay. Nice to meet you.
13:21
Case Aiken
Oh, yes. Good to meet you. Well, if you boys want to go wash up, we got some water in the trough over there, and then supper will be ready shortly.
13:30
Ben
Thank you so much.
13:32
Case Aiken
Arvis, in this whole sort of experience, do you want to show them your room? Do you want to describe how it's decorated? Like, what you've done in your sort of rural existence to sort of articulate your interests. Like, what is your nerdom?
13:48
Ben
Yeah, Addie, what do you imagine poor white people live like?
13:59
Jmike
I can't wait to find out how.
14:01
Ben
You think I grew up. Go ahead.
14:04
Case Aiken
The best part is that the characterization of Arvis Reed is entirely dictated by how negative his roles were. He has major penalties in all mental stats. And I was like, I. I guess we're going to have to play it this way.
14:18
Jmike
I guess it's a.
14:19
Ben
All right, cool. Oh, oh, hold on.
14:25
Addy
Whatever.
14:26
Ben
Whatever that means slower.
14:28
Addy
Some of us like to take our time.
14:31
Case Aiken
Taking your time. Like you're taking your time to walk over to your room so you can show them all.
14:39
Jmike
Well. Please.
14:39
Addy
Nothing good ever happened in a hurry.
14:43
Ben
That's not what mama said. All right, go ahead.
14:48
Addy
Well, if you fellas, you could. You could look at my room, and I have my collection of various foliage from. From the area. Because I. I do really like being out. Out in the nature areas. In fact, I have a lot of knowledge, some would say a plus nine, of knowledge in nature.
15:13
Case Aiken
You hear from down the hall to Poils going, yeah, boy, you're talking about your leaves again.
15:20
Addy
Yeah. Found the ones that color. All color orange.
15:25
Case Aiken
Oh, the crispy ones.
15:27
Addy
Yeah. I like the way they look, you know? So I decided to put them various leaves up on the wall. I also happen to like handling animals. You know, I. I have heard also, while the same people who say I have a plus nine in knowing nature also say I have a plus seven when it comes to handling animals.
15:53
Case Aiken
He's got some weird friends who always assign numbers to things.
15:59
Addy
I have one friend, and he has ocd, so he likes to assign numbers to a lot of things.
16:05
Ben
Ocd. You know what OCD is?
16:10
Addy
Well, we're not. We're not complete idiots out here, no matter what you. You people out in the suburbs might think.
16:17
Ben
I'm just curious. First of all, easy with the you people. Hey, before. Before we make this. This planet great again, what I want to know is. What.
16:32
Jmike
What.
16:32
Ben
What? Like. Like what? Like psychiatric organization is establishing what OCD is around here?
16:41
Case Aiken
Finn raises his hand.
16:42
Ben
Yeah.
16:42
Case Aiken
Oh, well, don't you know, the. The. The sciences of the. Of the mind are very well respected on this land.
16:50
Ben
Okay, I should have known. Thank you so much, Finn. All right, carry on. Tell us more about your leaves, good sir.
16:56
Addy
Well, beyond the leaves, we. We. I. We also like looking to the stars. And every now and then, we've had objects that sometimes fall from the skies, and I do like to collect them. I do hope you Know, I've heard of these, these sort of metal birds that fly in the sky and sometimes even go above the sky. And sometimes we have parts here and there that have fallen. I know you see them more in the cities and every now and then I like to go buy these little doohickeys that sometimes the vendors sell out in the, in the town. So. So I have a collection of them. I have no idea what you would do with them or you would make a metal bird fly, because that seems pretty crazy, but that's something I would like to do one day.
17:41
Ben
Well, I, you know, do you mind showing us your collection of doohickeys?
17:46
Addy
Sure. They're right over. Right over there in the corner.
17:49
Ben
Show me your doohickey.
17:50
Case Aiken
Finn walks over and he's like, there's nothing here on the corner. And he puts his hand up against it. And that's when, like, the wall kind of shifts over because you actually had like a hidden away compartment. Finn presses harder and the wall that had slid up a bit like, opens fully. And Arvis points inside. Phallies and stimbolt. Give me spot checks.
18:21
Ben
1726.
18:24
Case Aiken
Okay, you guys look in there and you see actually an old style powering system for a ship.
18:36
Jmike
Oh, my God.
18:40
Case Aiken
It's smaller. It's small enough that actually could work with the Susan. It would take up a bunch of space, like more than what would normally go, but it would actually work. And it's something that while you have to rig up a cart, drag it wouldn't be like the most onerous task to get there.
18:57
Jmike
Do you see this?
18:58
Ben
I see it.
19:00
Jmike
How did he get this in here?
19:02
Case Aiken
Who cares?
19:02
Ben
Let's get it out of here. Arvis, you said you wanted to fly sometime in one of them big metal birds.
19:09
Addy
Absolutely. I dream of it.
19:11
Ben
I bet you do. What if I could make that a reality for you?
19:14
Addy
Well, I got to make sure my family's okay with handling the nerfs, but that won't be a problem. That. That's. Someone else will have to take the shift anyway. But yeah, absolutely, I'd be on board.
19:28
Case Aiken
You hear Depoil in the distance being like, oh, yeah, you should go. Don't you know, it's actually better for the Nerfs if we don't have him? Oh.
19:38
Addy
Oh, I know you, Kid Dupoil. I don't know if you two have brothers, but they're. They're lovely human beings.
19:45
Case Aiken
Avis is about as effective at being a nerf herder as your piss is Effective at watering the grass.
19:53
Addy
To be fair, we had a cousin whose piss was very good at watering the grass.
19:57
Case Aiken
That's cause all he did was drink water that was meant for the grass.
20:01
Addy
He seemed to like the taste.
20:03
Case Aiken
His piss came out cleaner than any piss I've ever seen. It came out cleaner than the water at the stream down the way.
20:08
Addy
He was basically a filter.
20:12
Case Aiken
It's like his balls were made of sandstone or limestone or some shape.
20:16
Addy
We nicknamed him Brita.
20:19
Case Aiken
Brita did always have the best bodies, though. We had to admit that when it came time for us to go out to refill the jugs of water, he could just do it himself. And were fine with that.
20:33
Jmike
You were?
20:34
Case Aiken
Oh, my God.
20:36
Addy
Oh, I just made a connection. You know what? Let's go take care of this. This metal bird you guys have.
20:44
Ben
You just made a connection, huh?
20:46
Case Aiken
That's. That's a good idea. Boy, you should probably go, because then we might not have so many nerfs wander off miraculously when you happen to fall asleep.
20:54
Addy
I tend to believe that nerfs are at their best when they get to be free range.
20:58
Case Aiken
Yeah, but free range implies that you're able to bring it back here so that we have something to milk and then to eat.
21:03
Addy
I. I see your point. But I still think they'll be. They'll return home.
21:07
Case Aiken
You're lucky I don't get part of it. I'll smack your head.
21:15
Ben
You hear that, Pa? The boys are fighting again.
21:21
Case Aiken
Okay, Paul, that's good. That's how I like it.
21:26
Ben
Yeah, me too. All right, this is fun. But, hey, look. You see this. This big piece of equipment right here?
21:32
Jmike
Arlis.
21:33
Case Aiken
Yeah.
21:34
Ben
This piece of equipment can help us fix our ship or our big metal bird. And we can let you come on aboard with us. And as soon as we get this piece of equipment in and fix it up real good, we can fly anywhere you want to go.
21:47
Addy
Well, I'll be danged. Yeah, let's do this.
21:50
Case Aiken
Finn is actually kind of like, bouncing up and down. He's, like, so excited at this prospect.
21:53
Ben
I know, right?
21:53
Case Aiken
This is pretty awesome, because even though he's more civilized than Arvis, he is still like a feudalistic kind of knight who's only marginally aware of the existence of technology. The idea of, like, seeing a working spaceship is just so fascinating to him.
22:06
Ben
Yeah. You're gonna love this ship. It's gonna be amazing.
22:10
Case Aiken
All right.
22:10
Ben
All we gotta do is figure out how to drag this thing over to remember where you found us. Well, where we're headed were already headed there, so we just need to go there. But we need to drag this piece of equipment.
22:19
Jmike
We need a cart.
22:20
Ben
We've got Tauntauns we can fill. You got any, like?
22:23
Addy
Yeah, well, that's why we came here, so we could get the Tauntauns. We just need to get a cart for the Tauntaun and we got one of those in the barn, so yeah, we couldn't. We can hitch it all up and. And make, you know, head over to your.
22:37
Jmike
What.
22:37
Addy
What'd you call your metal bird ship?
22:40
Case Aiken
Oh yeah. So this ship is. We don't know exactly where it is because we found you out in the Badlands. I know how to get to the Badlands. Basically we're going through the woods though, so we're not, you know, going off of roads like the. The like I. I know the right direction, but that's about it, you know.
22:57
Ben
Okay, well, we'll figure it out when we get there.
23:00
Addy
You boys survive the Badlands?
23:02
Ben
Yeah, we're badass.
23:04
Case Aiken
Wait, I heard in the Badlands, don't you know that there's all kinds of scary things, like stuff that has like burning blood and also rats.
23:14
Addy
Yeah.
23:15
Case Aiken
You guys survived the Badlands?
23:16
Ben
Yep. Yep. Stimbolt over there killed one of them things that. Right. Stim bolt.
23:22
Jmike
Yeah, I did.
23:24
Case Aiken
Oh yeah, it must be. Oh yeah. Oh yeah, it must because you had a force user with you. Don't you know?
23:31
Jmike
And we had weapons that.
23:32
Ben
Weapons were a big part of that.
23:35
Case Aiken
Weapons that made my lance put to shame.
23:37
Ben
Yep, those were good times. We don't have that now. We're gonna wing it. The good news is that we killed a path along the way so we don't have to kill it on the way back. So we should be okay. But what I am gonna suggest is that we bring one of your sisters. Or is it one sister?
23:54
Case Aiken
Two sister.
23:54
Ben
How many sisters do you have Arlis got.
23:58
Addy
We got two sisters.
23:59
Ben
All right, well, we'll bring the one that's fancy on Stembold over here. I strongly so that she can bring the Tauntauns back to your family because you're not gonna be able to and we don't want to leave them out in the Badlands to die.
24:11
Addy
She's gonna be busy today. I mean, she's already working on the. The meals for tonight, so I don't know if that's gonna work out.
24:18
Jmike
She can't come. She's busy.
24:19
Ben
Well, what about the other sister?
24:20
Case Aiken
There's a knock on the door and Arvis, your Other sister, Jessie Ray. Oh, yoo hoo. I heard we have some boys here.
24:29
Addy
Oh, calm down, Jessie Ray.
24:32
Case Aiken
Oh, don't you tell me to calm down, Arvis. I wanted to meet your boys. I heard that one was horny. I heard one was a Ranger.
24:41
Jmike
He's horny.
24:43
Ben
Nope.
24:46
Addy
Yes, we do have a horny man. And we have a Ranger. And then we got a Nerf.
24:50
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. I'm Finn. I am Killian Ranger. Well, I was an apprentice, but now my master is dead, so I guess I'm techno, technically.
24:59
Ben
Well, that got dark quick.
25:00
Jmike
Yeah, real quick.
25:02
Case Aiken
I guess I'm a Ranger.
25:03
Ben
And this is the horny bastard right here. His name's Stimbolt. Say hi, Stimbolt.
25:07
Case Aiken
Sorry, I'm just. I'm just a. Impressed about my master. About Griff.
25:12
Ben
Here, hold my. It'll help you feel better.
25:15
Case Aiken
I have a pussy of my own, but sure, it never hurts to have more than one. Yeah, nothing is better in the world than strange pussy.
25:22
Ben
That's so true. So true.
25:25
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. Having that, having that's. That's the thing that I really like. Ooh, don't you know?
25:30
Jmike
Yep. Yeah. So.
25:34
Case Aiken
Well. Hi, Ms. Jessie Rae. I am Finn Killian, Ranger. Oh, how. I've heard so many good things about you. I see you've got some nice pussy in your hand right there. Seems you know how to handle the pussy.
25:51
Jmike
Oh, yeah.
25:52
Case Aiken
I. It's the Force.
25:55
Ben
It's the Force. Is that from the original Jedi text? Turns out those original Jedi texts were just like romance novels.
26:12
Case Aiken
No, it's actually the pages of the Diary of the Whills that Diary of the Wills father took out so that he could publish it without people saying the sexy stories.
26:20
Ben
Nice, Nice. Like the Diary of Anne Frank.
26:23
Case Aiken
Yes,.
26:27
Jmike
Thank you for getting that.
26:29
Ben
It's fantastic.
26:31
Addy
Well, Jesse, would you be willing to help us take the animals and take these people to their. Well, apparently they have one of those metal birds they called. Called it a.
26:43
Case Aiken
Metal bird.
26:44
Addy
Well, they got one of these metal birds we could take and we could take them to it and they can help us. They. Apparently they'll even let me ride in the metal bird.
26:54
Case Aiken
They'll let you ride in the metal bird. That's. Oh, Arvis, that sounds just like a dream come true.
27:00
Addy
Absolutely. Would we. We would be ready to go in the morning. Are you available for that?
27:06
Case Aiken
Oh, honey, you know, and your friends should know that I'm always available.
27:11
Ben
You hear that, Stembalt? She's always available.
27:14
Jmike
She's talking to Finn.
27:16
Case Aiken
Yes, thank you. Thank you. Horner1, your astuteness is appreciated for communicating with your friend.
27:24
Jmike
Just gonna stay way over here.
27:26
Case Aiken
Yes, please do that. You're creepy looking alien skins. Oh, thank you. Unsettling to me.
27:30
Jmike
Oh, thank you so much.
27:31
Case Aiken
That's racist. It's not racist, just my preference. Okay, all right, fair enough.
27:39
Ben
All right, when can we leave? Because as lovely as this hole is, I'm ready to get out of it.
27:47
Addy
You don't want to have something to eat?
27:49
Jmike
No, I think we're good.
27:49
Addy
You guys look pretty exhausted. I. I mean.
27:52
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah, I agree. I think stopping for food and a night's rest is not the wor. End of the world. I think we'll die if we go too much longer.
28:02
Ben
Well, since you put it that way, I suppose we'll sit down and have some mighty. Some mighty fine morsels.
28:08
Addy
It feels like you. Looks like you guys took a lot of left turns somewhere.
28:12
Ben
Damn it.
28:13
Jmike
You could say that. Yep, definitely.
28:16
Ben
But it turned out all right. Thank you. Thank you.
28:22
Addy
Oh, I see you played with your words.
28:31
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. Phelius is a. Apparently a master. Oh yeah.
28:35
Jmike
Of.
28:36
Case Aiken
Of wordplay and diplomacy.
28:39
Ben
Diplomacy? Yes. I bet if I had an OCD friend, he would say that. I have, oh, I don't know, a plus 15 in diplomacy.
28:51
Case Aiken
You hear a voice from down the hallway. Oh, yeah. Does your friend. Does your friend there have a friend? Like your weird friend?
28:58
Ben
I don't have that many friends.
29:01
Case Aiken
I would assume so.
29:03
Ben
Yeah. Yeah, my. My only friend just went crazy and tried to kill us.
29:09
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah, that was. That was terrible. You should all be aware that there is some danger for accompanying us. This world might be plunged into darkness soon and we need to stand together in this great quest to rid the world of evil. Yep.
29:26
Ben
Or we could just go just throwing it out there.
29:31
Case Aiken
Your humor is appreciated, friend, but obviously we are. We, as heroes of the story, must continue on and do our best to save the world.
29:39
Ben
Sure, Absolutely.
29:42
Jmike
Yes. We're going to leave.
29:46
Case Aiken
Ms. Jessie rang. If you would just be so kind and just go help your sister and your brother prep the food and then we'll. That we're heartfully accepting. While we make preparations with this trinket of your brother's that we're borrowing. We will have some food. We'll rest for a few hours and then we'll get up like well before dawn and continue traveling towards the badlands.
30:14
Ben
Sounds great. Rub a dub. Let's get some grub.
30:18
Case Aiken
A little bit of time goes by, they prep food. It's gross. The meat is gamey. It's not properly cooked, it's not going to make you sick, but you're not going to be. You're not really enjoying it going down. The seasoning is a really weird choices. It's like they're kind of like grinding up like just regular grasses that are around there and drying them out without really any sort of spice value. It's almost like it adds like patches of nothing, like flavor voids when you take bites into it. And so it's like really unsettling. You're like, what the fuck is going on here? The water is suspect and really, man,.
31:00
Ben
I wish I had one of those life taps.
31:02
Addy
It would have been better if we had Bretta over. But.
31:07
Case Aiken
However, however they do have some crude bread. It's like very like multigrain.
31:14
Ben
Oh, nice.
31:15
Case Aiken
And Nerf butter is amazing.
31:18
Ben
Of course it is.
31:19
Case Aiken
Nerf butter is fantastic. It's like this like the oiliness to it just sort of like seeps into the bread and like the bread's like fine. But like with that Nerf butter you're like, this is the right shit right here.
31:34
Jmike
Here.
31:34
Case Aiken
Like you take a bite into it and you're like, I don't even need it to be salted. Like it's just amazing by itself.
31:41
Ben
No, no. How do you guys make. I'm gonna.
31:46
Jmike
Don't ask questions, I gotta know. Don't ask questions.
31:50
Ben
I gotta know before I have a second helping. How do you guys make this Nerf butter so good?
31:54
Jmike
God damn it, look at his face.
32:00
Addy
I know a lot about nature. I don't have a lot of knowledge about butter. I just watch the nerfs. I don't.
32:06
Ben
You don't even do that.
32:09
Case Aiken
Patapan goes. You just take the milk from the nerves. You squeeze after udders like that and. But you know, the reptilians show you it's actually, you got to go under the skin to get the udders going. And you collect it into your bucket and then you take it and you churn it and you add the right mix of ground up grass. And that grass is a little weird, but you know, if you put it in with the, at the right time, the oil seep into it and extract some of the shouts out of the natural milk. And that actually makes it a little bit better in that regard.
32:48
Case Aiken
And you age it the proper amount and you churn it and that whole time you're just, you know, like, I'll just have my garters just churning it like that and it's great, but it's not anything really that complicated. We used to try using some butter from other creatures, and it just doesn't quite work as well as the nurse.
33:10
Ben
Yeah, this is fantastic.
33:12
Case Aiken
It's our best selling product when we go into town.
33:15
Ben
I believe that it is fantastic. May I have some more bread and butter, please?
33:21
Case Aiken
Yeah, absolutely. Just make sure before you get out, we're gonna need you to at least buy a souvenir bucket of butter.
33:31
Ben
Absolutely. I might buy two. This is great butter.
33:35
Addy
If the fruits were in season, we'd have those. Mehluron butter. And those are beyond. That's beyond amazing.
33:42
Jmike
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
33:43
Case Aiken
The younger crowd wouldn't take good. Oh, yeah. So, boys, it would just be polite of y' all if you were to buy two buckets of the butter every time we have guests. This way, we try to get a little something. It's better when we don't have to take him town. The money can go right to the family. Isn't that right?
34:05
Addy
Absolutely. But, I mean, we do have to remember, two of these fellers are not even from this world. Do you boys even have money from Killia?
34:15
Case Aiken
Oh, we can work with the rudimentary barter economy.
34:18
Ben
Hear that?
34:20
Jmike
What do we have to barter?
34:21
Ben
Oh, no. You'll think of something.
34:23
Jmike
No, I won't.
34:24
Case Aiken
Cleopity starts stroking your horns.
34:27
Jmike
Nope.
34:28
Ben
This is happening.
34:31
Case Aiken
You should come on.
34:32
Jmike
Me,.
34:35
Case Aiken
J. Mike, do you want to.
34:36
Ben
Get off this planet or not?
34:38
Jmike
Why do I have to be the sacrifice?
34:41
Ben
Because.
34:41
Case Aiken
Oh, honey, you're not the only sacrifice. As Jesse Ray strokes Finn's lance.
34:49
Ben
Yeah, stroking his lance.
34:52
Case Aiken
Hey, Paul.
34:54
Jmike
Hey, Paul, you might want to check. You might want to check your nerves around this guy. He's been watching him pretty strangely ever since we got back,.
35:07
Addy
Trying to get butter from the nerfs.
35:08
Ben
That Nerf butter really is amazing, though. I don't care what you guys.
35:12
Case Aiken
He's addicted to nerves. She's obviously a ne.
35:16
Ben
You know what? Yep. Fine. Just. I'll sit here, eat the bread. You guys work out your barters.
35:23
Case Aiken
I knew it. I could smell it on your poop.
35:25
Ben
Yeah, that's the way it is. Why don't you guys go work out your barter system? I'm just gonna help clean up the mess here and have some more butter.
35:36
Case Aiken
That sounds like a good plan.
35:37
Jmike
Does it? Yep.
35:38
Case Aiken
Sounds like a great plan.
35:39
Ben
Chat.
35:40
Case Aiken
Do you want to talk to or not? Well, just so that we're clear, while you'll get into butter and the fact that we're making this sort of tit for tat.
35:51
Ben
Because you're tattooed. That's why it's funny.
35:56
Case Aiken
You see, we got some business cards here that when you go out, you should introduce them. It's the Reed butter. The Nerf butter from Reed. That is the slogan. The Reed butter. The Nerf butter from Reed. And it will go. We just want to expand our brand, so if you could just go for it.
36:17
Ben
Yeah, I'll. I'll go hand out some cards and you wonderful folk, you know, work out the details. I'll be back later.
36:25
Case Aiken
Well, that sounds good. Yep.
36:27
Ben
Bye.
36:29
Case Aiken
Fun happens. It turns out she's quite good at this.
36:32
Ben
Aw, good for you, J. Mike. Baby's all grown up.
36:38
Case Aiken
Yes, she's quite good at this. Apparently it's in that sort of like, wow, I'm a little scared. But at the same time, this is great. I'm not doing nearly as much work as I normally have to.
36:47
Jmike
Man.
36:50
Case Aiken
And Finn, you just hear in the distance, like, oh, yah. Oh, yeah.
36:56
Ben
Oh, no.
36:58
Case Aiken
And then you guys all kind of drift off to sleep. And morning comes.
37:03
Ben
I handed out a lot of cards to nobody that I saw outside because.
37:07
Case Aiken
In the middle of nowhere. But I tried. And the ladies come out with you. Now that Arvis is relinquishing his role as a nerf herder, Depoil is already out in the fields looking after the Nerfs. And Paw you can hear in the distance is chopping lumber.
37:26
Ben
Nice. All right, well, I hope you guys.
37:30
Case Aiken
Had a great night's sleep.
37:31
Ben
We got a long journey ahead of us. We need to figure out some kind of way to get this thing outside and up on the rig for the tauntauns to haul, and then we can head on out.
37:46
Jmike
Do we know how heavy it is?
37:48
Case Aiken
It's gonna take a wagon. A single tauntaun should be able to pull it without too much difficulty. It's not like such a big thing that you would need, like, a four oxen kind of carriage.
37:58
Jmike
Do we have any spare tauntauns that we can ride on?
38:02
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. There's one right there.
38:03
Ben
Yeah, we're all gonna have a tauntaun.
38:05
Jmike
Yep.
38:06
Ben
Who's coming? Do we have anybody who's coming along?
38:09
Case Aiken
Oh, we are. Thank you.
38:10
Ben
Oh, Both girls.
38:11
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah.
38:12
Ben
Oh, yeah. This is gonna be fun.
38:16
Jmike
Oh, God.
38:18
Case Aiken
You boys are gonna show. You're gonna have to show us how to use one. What you. What'd you call it? A ship? Is that what you called it? Shipping?
38:24
Ben
I don't know. What'd you call it last Night.
38:27
Jmike
Help.
38:30
Case Aiken
I told you not to say my safety save for.
38:40
Ben
All right, well, let's go.
38:43
Case Aiken
All right, so you guys load up the power system. Actually, Finn loads it up, and he uses the power of the force to rise it up so that you're able to back the cart underneath it. And then he drops it off. Yeah. Oh, yeah, that was. Size does not matter. Don't you know?
39:08
Ben
Which one was he banging?
39:10
Case Aiken
I was banging Jesse Ray.
39:12
Ben
Jesse Ray. Is that true, Jessie Ray? Size doesn't matter.
39:17
Case Aiken
It's something we say, and, I mean, some people are able to make up with it with the appropriate force.
39:23
Ben
Oh, right.
39:25
Jmike
Well, then.
39:26
Ben
All right, Finn.
39:27
Jmike
All right.
39:28
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. I make up for my failings in multiple ways.
39:32
Ben
Okay, well, I don't want to know anymore. Let's get going.
39:36
Jmike
You keep asking these questions, man.
39:39
Ben
I'm having the time of my life.
39:41
Case Aiken
Making a note for a Size doesn't matter. It's before dawn. You are all on your way. The sun is starting to peek out a little bit. You can see just thin lines of light coming over the horizon line. You're traveling to the badlands, and as you're going, you're kicking up, like, a lot of dirt. Like, you've gone from sort of like a grassier area to more like brush and, like, dirt, like. Like sandy area. It's starting to become much more, like, deserty, and it's kicking up a lot. And it's. As you're traveling, especially now that you're going off, like, any particular road, it's kicking up actually quite a bit. And you think that you're not actually seeing as much sunlight as should be coming upon you now. Like, you think that you've actually.
40:36
Case Aiken
You're in a bit of a dust cloud that you've kicked up too much. Like, you can still see basically what's immediately around you, but your. Your range of vision is really cut off.
40:44
Jmike
Hey, we're still going the right way, right?
40:47
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah, I think so. Don't you know, would you be the.
40:51
Addy
Fellers to know if we're going in the right way, direct?
40:54
Case Aiken
Well, we sort of brought. You don't, you know, to help be. Be sort of additional aid since you're from around these parts? We're coming from a different vector of approach than I'm used to going to.
41:04
Addy
Oh, well, I just kind of wander to wherever the nerfs need to go. I. Yeah.
41:09
Case Aiken
Oh, fuck. Oh, fuck. Yeah. Yep. Yep. Oh, fuck. Don't you know? Okay, well, all right. And this is gonna begin a skill challenge, guys.
41:23
Ben
God damn it.
41:24
Case Aiken
So you have, you are now like just from the speed of your traveling, you've kicked up this, like this dust cloud, this like this mist around you, and you're now having a really hard time seeing and keeping on course to get to the Badlands. From the Badlands, at least there's like some sort of markers. But out here it's very flat. Like, there's minor curves to the land, but it's not a lot. There's no like prominent trees or anything like that. And because you can't see far enough to see a horizon, you don't even know what areas look like. They have a forest, which is the wrong direction versus, like open field, which would be the right direction. Until you can actually see like the rock formations, you just do not have that visibility. Stimul, you are up. So the goal is to.
42:08
Case Aiken
While you're in this like misty dust cloud, you need to be able to pick a skill that will be applicable to trying to find your way through it.
42:18
Jmike
Well, can I do a spot check first?
42:19
Case Aiken
Absolutely. That's a perfect skill for it. Just to see, like, if I can.
42:23
Jmike
Get a general sense of what we are. Yeah. And God damn it. 5.
42:30
Case Aiken
Unfortunately, no, that is.
42:33
Ben
You gotta look with your eyes open, dummy.
42:35
Jmike
I'm looking at the ground. If I. Apparently there's lots of sand. There's so much sand. I hate sand. It gets everywhere.
42:44
Case Aiken
You are so turned around, you're wandering around trying to spot things and you actually keep tripping over brushes that just come out of this cloud. You walk and then all of a sudden there's a tiny tree right where your foot is. You keep falling over as a result. And so each time you get up again, you're less certain of which way you're walking to begin with. So you have a really hard time now identifying where, like even where you're coming from, let alone if it was the wrong right or wrong track.
43:13
Ben
Nice.
43:14
Case Aiken
Arvis, you are up.
43:16
Ben
Big money, no whammies.
43:18
Addy
All right, well, I'm going to try to use my riding skills to be able to. To keep to the. The path. See if I can eye the path through the. Through this. These conditions. And I have a 19.
43:34
Case Aiken
Okay, that's a success. You actually know that even though you can't see very well, like, the Tauntauns have an instinct for these kind of situations. Like, it's almost like the species as a whole was very good at both difficult terrain and poor visibility conditions. Like, you don't know this the others who are more space firing would have a basic idea that, like, they're very common for ice worlds and also deserts, worlds that are very inhospitable to other creatures. Like, they thrive when other creatures have a hard time living because they are always able to sort of find their way safely. So very good. Yeah. You know, to trust your tauntaun. And the tauntaun is able to sort of like guide you guys a little bit better. Like, you stop having so many incidents bumping into like small trees.
44:27
Case Aiken
And it almost seems like you can sort of spot the sun, which is giving you idea at least the direction you were walking in. Even if you could be like going off path a bit. Like you're at least going not the wrong absolute direction. So that was good. And phallus, you're up.
44:46
Ben
I want to do a survival.
44:49
Case Aiken
Okay. Yeah.
44:51
Ben
23.
44:52
Case Aiken
That is a success. You are able to kind of focus on the way some of the things are growing. Like, you know that you were coming from a more of a grasslands kind of area into this. And so you're able to infer, like, as you find like shorter ones. You're like, this is the area where like life is having a harder time and this is at least in the right direction. You're using all your tracking skills to actually identify like, at least the proper, like towards the badland, because it's going to be like worse and worse foliage as we go.
45:25
Ben
Okay, cool.
45:27
Case Aiken
All right, we're back to Stimbolt.
45:31
Jmike
Can I use gather information?
45:34
Case Aiken
Yeah, but explain to me what you mean, because gather information is usually based on like spy information kind of. Here, let me be clear about this one. So it's usually in this edition seen as sort of like a social skill. Now what you could do is you could try to relay from the NPCs that are with you because they're not participating in the skill challenge. But this would be an opportunity to utilize them. So this would be like, you could use Finn, or you could use either Jessie Ray or Kleppany, because both of them are locals and have more brain cells than Arvis.
46:11
Jmike
We'll do that.
46:14
Ben
That is so put out.
46:16
Case Aiken
It was your dice rolls.
46:18
Ben
Got nobody to blame but yourself, buddy.
46:21
Addy
I feel insulted, but I'm not sure I quite understand the insults.
46:29
Jmike
Kleppany.
46:31
Case Aiken
I mean, you can crowdsource this. You don't need to just. You don't have to target anyone.
46:35
Jmike
Okay. So I just asked if they know where we are or if this looks familiar to Them.
46:41
Case Aiken
Yeah. Give me some guidance in terms of like what they would spot that you wouldn't just easily.
46:46
Jmike
Landmarks or something.
46:47
Ben
Sure.
46:48
Jmike
Okay.
46:48
Case Aiken
Yeah.
46:48
Jmike
Does any of this stuff look familiar to you guys? Like, landmarks? Trees are not shrubs.
46:53
Case Aiken
The patterns, rock formations.
46:55
Jmike
Rock formations, anything.
46:56
Case Aiken
Okay, give me a roll.
46:58
Addy
I believe I took a tree, a leaf off of one of those trees, but I'm not sure because a lot of those trees look a lot.
47:06
Case Aiken
Arvest in the distance coming from your home. You hear the scream. Sorry.
47:18
Jmike
16.
47:19
Case Aiken
16. That is a success.
47:21
Ben
Well done, sir.
47:22
Case Aiken
Yeah, so actually Jessie Ray notes that like she's like, oh, yeah. So I can see how the way that the sun is cutting in through this here mist, you can tell that the way the light is bending that it's actually coming from that direction over there. It's kind of like when you look into a pool and you put your hand in and your hand moves over a few inches. It's like that.
47:45
Ben
That's exactly what it's like.
47:47
Jmike
You're right.
47:47
Ben
Nail polish it. Awesome. Awesome.
47:52
Case Aiken
Yes. We at the Reed family love the community pool.
47:55
Jmike
Good to know. It's great to know. Community pool.
47:59
Case Aiken
Yeah. There's some adult swimming after hours.
48:03
Jmike
Okay. I think. How about that way, guys?
48:07
Case Aiken
Yep. So next up it is Arvis. Come on.
48:12
Ben
Come on, Ninja.
48:14
Addy
I want to continue trusting the animals that we have, and I want to use Handle animal.
48:21
Case Aiken
Sure. Yeah.
48:22
Addy
To make sure that we can navigate through this.
48:23
Ben
Handle your animal.
48:24
Case Aiken
Yeah. Just because what you're doing is such a similar application as ride. And this is why in later editions they just fuse the skills together. Could you give me just a little more context for how you're handling the animal?
48:37
Addy
Sure.
48:38
Case Aiken
Just some color. Yes.
48:40
Ben
Stroke that animal, Addy.
48:44
Addy
I, I, I decide to, to whisper to the tauntaun.
48:52
Ben
It's the tauntaun whisperer.
48:55
Addy
Because, Because I, I heard once that whisper into animals will sometimes help them and tap into some of their natural abilities and disciplines and help us a little bit more out in these times of need. You know, I also hear that sometimes cutting them open is sometimes a good shelter if it's really cold. But I don't believe we're at that point in this.
49:17
Ben
No, no, we've not gotten there yet.
49:19
Jmike
No.
49:19
Ben
Thank you. Thank you for not gutting your tauntaun in the middle of our crisis.
49:26
Addy
I just know there are various uses for tauntauns.
49:29
Ben
Let me ask you a question, since you are an expert animal herder and whatnot. What. What. What kind of disciplines and. And things do tauntauns have that you're going to tap into with your whispers?
49:45
Addy
Well, sometimes they can get very finicky, and they can be a little bit wild and they can bite if you're not very careful. But sometimes if you know, you tame them and you. You raise them and you. You, you know, you clean up for them and all sometimes that they're. They're animals that. That can help you navigate through. Through fights and through. Through storms and through other. Other various dangerous conditions. Tauntauns are. Can even sometimes climb up harsh terrain. So, so would tapping into those natural abilities is something that I think the whispering might bring out.
50:25
Case Aiken
All right, let's get a roll.
50:29
Ben
Case is not having any of that.
50:34
Jmike
Ooh.
50:35
Addy
1926.
50:39
Case Aiken
Okay, so you sort of whisper param youm and your. Your tanta responds very well to this whole thing. And you. You guys, it. It seems to just like, follow it an even smoother path. It's like missing all the. All the. The disruptions. Like, it's much. It's a better ride. And they seem to like, herd up a bit better rather than like, disparate Tauntaun sort of like moving their own directions. And everyone trying to, like, steer them to stay together, they're now like, as a unit, moving with. With purpose. So that's another success. And we are to Phallus right now. It's make or break right now because, yeah, it's bottom of the ninth.
51:31
Ben
Bases are loaded.
51:32
Case Aiken
Bases are loaded. You're down by three.
51:33
Ben
We're down by three. If I strike out, we're effed. If I hit this, if we win.
51:38
Case Aiken
The pack, if you get a triple, you're aft.
51:41
Jmike
That's.
51:41
Ben
That's true.
51:42
Case Aiken
Yeah. You need to hit a home run.
51:43
Ben
I gotta knock it out of the park. All right, this is it. I am gonna do a spot check to bring it home, and I'm gonna look and see if I can spot anything familiar, any kind of landmark that. That I might remember from leaving this, you know, leaving the area. So that will get us in the general direction of the Susan.
51:59
Case Aiken
Okay. Okay. So, yeah, this is fine. Stimulate you spot right off the bat. But you have. You haven't used it yet, and it's been a while, and you would have traveled to a very different spot at this point. No pun intended there. So, yeah, that's fine. Give me a roll.
52:16
Ben
Here we go.
52:20
Case Aiken
Yeah. So you have identified everything. Everyone's moving, and you tell everyone stop, and you pause for A moment, and the dust cloud starts to dissipate a little bit. And you guys realize that you now are standing on solid rock instead of on dirt. And the dust cloud dissipates, and directly in front of you would have run right into it, and it would have fucked you up if you had run right into it. There stands one of Arvis's nerfs.
52:53
Ben
God damn it, Arvis.
52:56
Addy
Oh, there you are, Gary.
52:59
Jmike
Gary? Gary the Nerf.
53:02
Case Aiken
Oh, you didn't tell me that Gary was one of the ones that you lost. It's truly fortuitous. Also good that you didn't run into him. Gary is known to trample people to death.
53:10
Ben
Damn it, Gary, calm down.
53:12
Jmike
Good job.
53:13
Addy
You're a little finicky.
53:15
Ben
How about that? Saving the day.
53:17
Case Aiken
Well, we can always have Gary ride with us until we get to where you're going, and then when we take the tomtoms back, it should be fine.
53:24
Ben
All right, sounds good to me. Let's bring Gary.
53:28
Case Aiken
So they lasso up Gary and start leading him along with you guys.
53:32
Jmike
And.
53:33
Case Aiken
Yeah, the Badlands are just before you. Nice, but we did a thing. Guys, as you are getting closer to the Badlands, you see in the distance, it's pretty small, so could I have spot checks from everyone? 20, 19. Okay. Stembolt and Phallus actually see a thing. Arvis does not.
53:55
Jmike
Shocker.
53:58
Case Aiken
In the distance, you can see, if you look closely, it looks like armed men of Killia guiding out the Alderaanians and the rest of the crew of the Susan. Like you can see very clearly. Pigo is there. And they're all just like. They're in bondage and being led away.
54:19
Ben
Oh, no.
54:20
Case Aiken
And you can see that they're using beasts of burden to drag out of the dirt. Or like the rock face, the Susan.
54:28
Jmike
This is bad at all.
54:31
Case Aiken
Oh, yeah. We should. We. We should try to get closer, but. But stealthily.
54:36
Ben
Finn, do you know who those guys are?
54:38
Case Aiken
It appears to be the men of House Fedor.
54:40
Ben
Damn it.
54:42
Case Aiken
Foe show.
54:45
Jmike
Curse him.
54:45
Case Aiken
Curse him. Oh, yeah.
54:47
Ben
The worst.
54:48
Case Aiken
We should curse him.
54:49
Ben
Definitely curse him.
54:51
Case Aiken
The Force is unfortunately too with him. We need to take the Force away from him.
54:56
Ben
Or we could just go just throwing that out there.
54:59
Jmike
We can't leave our friends here.
55:01
Case Aiken
If this is your means of salvation, if this is the reason we're lugging this power unit, we should. We should at least try to find out what's going on, and so we should approach with some caution.
55:11
Ben
Okay, we'll do that.
55:14
Case Aiken
Let's be cautious, ladies. You should All.
55:16
Addy
Yeah.
55:17
Case Aiken
You should stay here.
55:18
Jmike
You guys go home. Go back home, guys. It'll be safe.
55:23
Ben
Somebody has to tell the tale. J. Mike.
55:25
Jmike
Some they say failures. Failures are not safe. They need to go home. This could turn into a very dangerous battle.
55:34
Ben
I didn't realize you cared about them so much.
55:38
Case Aiken
You guys think that they should go home?
55:40
Jmike
What say you fail this?
55:43
Ben
I'm undecided.
55:45
Case Aiken
Arvest.
55:46
Jmike
How do you feel?
55:46
Addy
I reckon that if these people here are dangerous, we should put a stop to what they're doing.
55:52
Ben
Okay.
55:53
Case Aiken
Yeah. You have a good heart. I can see it.
55:55
Ben
Yep. Good heart, small brain. Love you, buddy.
56:03
Case Aiken
Don't you know, though he may be uncouth, he clearly is a man of Killia. And a real man at that.
56:10
Addy
Well, thank you, Finn.
56:12
Jmike
Oh, yeah.
56:13
Ben
Sparks are flying over there. All right, let's get going.
56:15
Case Aiken
I'm a big fan of House Reed.
56:16
Ben
Yeah, you are.
56:17
Case Aiken
I think technically I'm a part of it now.
56:20
Ben
You might have just put an extra branch on that stick.
56:23
Case Aiken
As is Stimbolt here.
56:25
Ben
Oh, yeah.
56:26
Jmike
Yay.
56:26
Case Aiken
Eskimo brothers.
56:27
Jmike
Is that right?
56:28
Ben
No, no,.
56:33
Jmike
No.
56:34
Ben
Oh, no.
56:36
Case Aiken
All right, well, Jesse, Ray, and Kleppany, you should take the Tauntauns. We'll proceed on foot. The Tauntauns will be too loud. They'll easily hear us coming. We should approach stealthfully and try to find what's going on.
56:54
Ben
Sounds great.
56:54
Case Aiken
Let's make it happen. Sneaky sneak. Yeah, so we'll just. We'll hide the power unit and then proceed on foot.
57:03
Ben
Okay.
57:04
Jmike
Are we going.
57:05
Ben
Wait a minute.
57:05
Jmike
Are we going down, like a rock face?
57:06
Ben
Like we can see the Susan from here, right?
57:08
Case Aiken
Yeah, it's in the distance. It's like a hill far away.
57:10
Jmike
Okay.
57:11
Ben
Yeah. I just want to make sure that.
57:12
Case Aiken
We're not getting stuck where we can't.
57:14
Ben
Get the engine to the Susan.
57:16
Case Aiken
No, Just wait for nothing. It. We.
57:19
Jmike
We.
57:19
Case Aiken
If we keep it on the cart, we can roll it ourselves. It'll. All right. It'll be an afternoon, but it will.
57:24
Jmike
It'll happen.
57:25
Case Aiken
All right.
57:25
Ben
Just want to make sure.
57:26
Case Aiken
All right. Cool.
57:27
Ben
All right, then. Let's. Let's sneaky sneak and see what's up.
57:30
Case Aiken
All right. Can I have everyone give me. Move silently checks as you approach.
57:34
Jmike
22, 15, 6. Good job.
57:42
Ben
I'm gassy.
57:44
Jmike
Great job, buddy.
57:46
Ben
Butter.
57:46
Case Aiken
It's going right through you.
57:48
Addy
You seem like the kind of feller who'd. When be chased by soldiers, you'd drop a large bag, gain all their attention.
57:59
Case Aiken
I know.
57:59
Addy
It's a very specific type of guy I just mentioned, but you really seem like,.
58:05
Jmike
Touche, touche.
58:08
Case Aiken
So you guys are approaching. I mean, like, everyone hears Phallus let out, like, the loudest of farts. And it's like, it doesn't come as a surprise to anyone. Cause Phallus was literally walking with a tub of butter that it's fingering into his.
58:20
Jmike
Oh, good.
58:22
Case Aiken
And there seems like it's loud enough that you guys start to see stirring in the distance. So you all take cover behind trees or rocks. And while you guys are in cover, Arvis, you feel a cylinder of metal pushed up against the back of your neck. And you hear the voice go, you better freeze. And with that, we're gonna end the session.
58:51
Addy
Well, you can catch up on all of the stories that are part of the Scruffy Nerf Herders on our website, certainpov.com, you can catch up. You can find out how Mara Jade entered this story, for that matter, and what else is going on within the greater context of the galaxy and the rebellion and how we kind of. And our scruffy nerfers and how they figure into it. You can find out more on our website, again, certainpov.com with more episodes as well. You can also check out while you're on our website, just go to Patreon. And if you want to be a part of what we do on these podcasts, you can. You can do that by being a patron. You can find out all about that on our website, certainpov.com and until next time, stay Scruffy.
59:33
Jmike
My nerf hunters.
59:38
Ben
Just got overwhelmed by the fact that we just made anne Frank joke.
59:41
Jmike
Oh, you just thought about. You just realized that?
59:48
Addy
Not proud of that?
59:50
Ben
I'm not proud. I'm just glad it was you who said it.
59:53
Case Aiken
This is a really blue episode. I don't think there's a way for us to cut it down so we. It doesn't have some of that.
01:00:00
Ben
No, he's gonna get some of it in there. Speaking of which, back to Jesse Ray Cpov.
01:00:07
Case Aiken
Certainpov.com.